We all know of one game or another that should not be played in polite company under any circumstances whatsoever. Whenever your parents come in for a visit, that may mean the games with *ahem* on the cover goes hiding away so you aren't interrogated about your love life once again (Mom, I'm working on it. Seriously). Or when young cousins under the age of 7 come over, Resident Evil 7 or Wolfenstein gets put away so that they won't run off with the case or begin screaming and repeating bad words back to your aunt. Good luck explaining that one.
This list is about some games you probably would not want to play around anyone due to the abundance of not-so-PG material and general fun times with all sorts of women and men of varying game systems. These are the games you put away in a suitcase under your bed, only to be pulled out by the light of the moon at night with no one around. There may not be "too much" in all cases, but it is definitely implied, and in some cases can be incredibly uncomfortable! Some of these games are good, some of them are bad, but they all have that weird sensuality and all the implications that make you want to play them after dark when no one is around. Here are 25 such games that will make you blush!
25 Give Her The Old Rail-Gun
Gal*Gun is a typical rail-gun game with a twist. The protagonist, Tenzou, is shot with several Cupid arrows by the apprentice angel, Patako, who is out trying to finish her apprenticeship. This suddenly makes him the most attractive man in the area, and all the women flock to him as a result. However, there is a caveat. If he doesn’t win the heart of his true love by sunset, he will be cursed with loneliness for his whole life. The big issue here becomes that he is constantly swarmed by the ladies, and the only way to get them off of him is to shoot him with his... love gun and rub on them in special modes where one can see their unmentionables. They also moan and make lots of noises when this happens, so keep your volume down.
24 Be Faithful — Or Else
Catherine, a somewhat recent cult favorite puzzle game, drips with a healthy mix of "adult" themes and horror. The main character, Vincent, is forced to choose between 2 women, Katherine (with a K) and Catherine (with a C). Katherine is very straight edge and professional with a good job, while Catherine is wild and free, more of a party girl. This conflict causes a lot of weird shenanigans to go on in Vincent’s dreams. These dreams are further complicated by him ultimately having relations of the nightly kind with Catherine, and he has to figure out how to deal with Katherine and the infidelity as a result. There is a lot of implied nudity, as well as a few full frontal shots so it's definitely a game you'll want to play when everyone is asleep.
23 Remember These?
Think of the dirtiest, perviest trivia show you can think of that involves flashing men in a brightly lit, straight from the 80s studio, then put it on a gaming system. That is essentially what The Guy Game is. It is basically set up like a trivia show (think Jeopardy but with a lot more shame — and no Alex Trebek) where for every correct answer the contestant makes, a variety of women will expose themselves, and play in absolutely, erm, interesting games like hopping (if you can even call hopping a game) or running races. This game faced a good bit of controversy when it was at the center of a lawsuit. Overall, it's one of those games you would probably want to play with other like-minded people, or play alone, which is honestly pretty sad.
22 You Can Try It Late At Night
This is pretty much just Skyrim, but everyone (namely the NPCs) never really learned about clothing. Given the number of mods and patches people make for Skyrim, this should definitely come as no surprise to many. Additionally, there is a patch out there that makes for some lewd outfits for the NPCs (yes, including the men), but does not overall affect game play of any sort. As I like to put it, Skyrim is a bit of a playground, and you can make everyone as naked or as clothed as you would like! You may just have to work a bit to find the patch and to make sure your younger cousin doesn't find it and blab to your aunt about you playing pervy games. You'll never hear the end of it otherwise.
21 It's In The Title
7 Sins is a life simulation video game where the player must get to the top of the social ladder and make decisions related to the seven deadly sins. The game is set in the fictional Apple City. Throughout the game, the player makes decisions based on pride, wrath, greed, envy, lust, sloth and gluttony in an effort to gain more power and achieve one's own earthly desires. Once a relationship has been built within one of these sins, new missions are unlocked. In total, there are seven chapters and one hundred non-player characters to interact with. There are some pretty raunchy scenes in this game based on lust, unsurprisingly, so again; it looks like the Sims, but it is not. Don't let your baby cousin play this.
20 Riana Rouge
I never expected to see a video game starring a centerfold model, but here we are, folks! Riana Rouge stars Playboy Playmate Gillian Bonner as Riana, a shy secretary who spies on her boss attempting to assault a coworker. She enters the office and tries to help her by overtaking her boss, but, she is overpowered by her boss and thrown out of the window. Somehow, she is transported to another world where she is a seductive warrior who must rescue the world from an evil dictator (her boss) and rescue her friend (the coworker). Again, in case you missed it, you are playing as a Playboy Playmate. So interesting times abound? Not exactly a game you may want to openly tout owning, but it might be worth a try!
19 X-Ray Glasses, hm?
In Killer is Dead, you play a James Bond-type character, and you go on secret missions much like a spy does, but with a more wacky undertone. In a specific mode in the game called "Gigolo mode," you can specifically look women up and down on every curve they have. You can use x-ray glasses as well to look under their clothes if you want to as well (which is totally not creepy at all). There is a certain meter you have to fill up before you can make a move on the woman in question, and if you succeed in making this move, you will be rewarded with a very strange scene with the woman. You can also get achievements in relation to these actions in Gigolo mode, so be prepared to have those on your list.
18 Like That Scene In Watchmen
I wonder sometimes if video game producers know what relations of the awkward fleshy kind are supposed to look like. Ride to Hell: Retribution contains a few good examples of such relations. In this game, the main character, Jake, is a drifter who recently came back from the Vietnam War. He drifts around the Western/Mid-Western parts of the United States, taking jobs and such. When he comes back from such jobs, he is awarded with full, denim on denim animatronic-like dry "fun" from some buxom women in minimal clothing. By the way, everyone is fulling clothed for every single relation, and everyone looks like they have never done this before and by the end, they will never want to again either. Even though this is not explicitly a sensual game, these scenes make the game a touch more awkward.
17 Play It For The Stories
Playboy has a reputation for having some of the most interesting pictures known to magazines, so given the title of this game, you probably have a good idea of what it implies. Playboy: The Mansion is about running the Playboy empire, so running the mansion, organizing the magazine, and maintaining relationships with colleagues and magazine models. Think of the Sims series, but with “mature content,” buxom women, and a slight semblance of shame. Now, I will say that there is no blatant nudity in this game (it’s all pretty heavily implied, though), but there is some implied relations and photos that go on, so don't go bragging about this game to everyone.
16 Passion Burns Deep
Luxuria Superbia is one of those games that, upon initial inspection, looks like a very artsy, colorful indy game. And it is! But as you play and explore the, ahem, hollows in the game, you realize it is much more than artsy, and is actually pretty dirty and pervy. The colors and tunnels you go through symbolize relationships and desires of the flesh, and from the music and words on the screen, many people tend to get some sort of feeling part of the way through the game. If you need a game with a more specific plot, this probably is not it, but if you have an open mind and want to try out something new, I would definitely give it a go. Just be prepared to answer lots of questions.
15 Aaaaawkward
Also known as Fahrenheit, Indigo Prophecy is not an implicitly dirty, but is a mystery of sorts. However, one particular scene near the end of the game tends to make people uncomfortable not just because of the implied intimacy with the dead (maybe) but also because of the two-personed tango, as many people call it (just me? Ok then) looks so stiff and undercomfortable. Maybe because Carla, the detective, is getting it on with Lucas, the main character, who was just resurrected and is clearly a part of the UNDEAD. Plus, they do the do in a train car, which is definitely the most classy of places to get it on. Overall, be prepared to shift uncomfortably and blush at this scene, but not for the best reasons.
14 Not Your Mom's Match-3
Huniepop is a uniquely fun dating sim that sort of isn't a dating sim. In Huniepop, you are approached by a love fairy named Kyu who wants to help you get laid. This isn’t one of those dating sims where you pursue just one suitor. No, you pursue them all, in the hopes of gaining achievement and pride. There are the typical archetypes, like the mean tsundere or the innocent cute cat girl (yes, there is a cat girl in this game), and you have to approach each of them differently in order to bed them. You play a puzzle match game for each date, and when you get them back to your place on the final date, you are met with *ahead*. Throughout the game, you also receive increasingly lewd pictures of each of the girls you date, so be mindful of who you play this around.
13 Started A Movement
If you have not heard of Lollipop Chainsaw or have seen the numerous cosplays of the main character, Juliet (looking at you, Jessica Nigri), you are either a dirty liar or don't follow video games too closely, in which case, how are you following this website? Anywho, Juliet, our main character, goes throughout the game in her skimpy cheerleader uniform with her boyfriends decapitated head attached to her waistband. The uniform is a bit on the nose along with the poses she tends to make with her trusty chainsaw, as you can see every little curve on her chest and booty. In addition, there is an achievement for looking up her skirt without her covering herself, so take that as you will and add it to your achievement list at your own peril.
12 What The!!
Have you ever gone shopping, saw your worst enemy, and thought, "I shall defeat you through the power of stripping you naked!" and proceeded to spread chaos throughout the area around you through the power of nudity? No? Well, that's the route that Akiba's Trip: Undead and Undressed takes with the enemies known as "Synthisters." In this bright, colorful, blatantly Japanese game, you explore what is called the Electric District (also known as Akihabara) as Akiba. Suddenly, the district is overtaken by these enemies, and your job is to strip them down and make them powerless to save the district. Why stripping defeats them? That was never really made super clear, but that is apparently just how things work around there, so no one really questioned it.
11 Someone Had To Make This Game...
Another game hailing from Japan, Senran Kagura is a game about young women who just so happen to be ninjas and warriors that engage in what is essentially a turf war. In the game, two different groups fight each other, and the more they fight and take damage, the more their clothes rip and fall off the girl's body. Of course, the women happen to be buxom and perky chested, which makes things particularly interesting when most of their damage is depleted. Additionally, there is a customization option where you can pick and choose what they wear, which adds a touch of perviness to the whole situation since the clothes are essentially going to be ripped off anyway. This would be a fun game to play in a group setting, depending on the group itself that is. Don't play this with children. Seriously.
10 Priorities Don't Match
Yet another not implicitly dirty game, Heavy Rain is a mystery video game where the main character, Ethan, is on the hunt for the Saw Jigsaw-like serial murderer who kidnapped his son, Shaun. The sensual parts of this game that are well known are well known for how bad and awkward they are. The most awkward one is likely the one right after Ethan's finger gets cut off in one of the murderer's cruel games, where Ethan's priorities are seriously questioned (at least by the player) due to, oh, I don't know, his finger just having been cut off. The scenes are also interactive, which makes things more awkward if you screw the whole thing up. Good luck with that.
9 Magic The ... Gathering What Exactly?
Have you ever played Yu-Gi-Oh, or Magic: The Gathering? Monster Monpiece is a card-based game much like these other 2 card games, except the cards have lewdly dressed moe girls on them with various powers and impacts on the battlefield (and the people around you should anyone look over your shoulder). During your turn in the game, you can rub on a card to create a certain effect, namely to seal the cards. As a result, you can remove the clothing from the girl in stages on the PS Vita screen. Just between you and me, it might be a good idea to avoid playing this out in public so people won't see you rubbing on a picture of a young anime girl. Good talk.
8 Realistic. Sure...
Unlike previous Dead or Alive games that played under the very thinly veiled idea of being an arena beat-em-up, Dead or Alive Xtreme 3 throws this fighting concept out the window and becomes what it was destined to be: a game with a ton of gratuitous booty and chest shots. The main premise of the game seems to be to dress up buxom women in itty bitty bathing suits and have them play volleyball with “realistic physics" if you get what I mean. Your big goal in the game is to become friends with another equally buxom woman by means of giving her gifts (including skimpy bathing suits). If you succeed, they will become your partner and play volleyball with you and bounce around the island with you, skimpy bathing suit and all.
7 Does It Get Better?
Bayonetta is a uniquely provocative game in the sense that the "maturity" of the character is what gives the character such great power and drive within the game. During Bayonetta’s journey to kill angelic beings and figure out who she is, she does a number of things that people may question and judge you (at least a little) for. Some of these actions include: stripping to summon a demon, making explicit noises when you press certain prompts or buttons, and making provocative statements such as, “Do you want to touch me?” when certain buttons are pressed as well. There are some blatant poses that Bayonetta makes that make one's mind wander. This is a fun game, mind you, but seriously, keep the volume down unless you want people asking questions.
6 Really Doesn't Get More Pandering
Leisure Suit Larry: Magna Cum Laude is incredibly chauvinistic in the way it approaches how to get into bed with women, and was at one point the center of controversy for this reason as well as the absurd amount of boobs. This game details the journey of a college student named Larry, who is on a mission to seduce as many buxom co-eds as he possibly can. He tries to do this in any way possible other than actually talking to the women. This ranges from sweet talking to pumping them full of alcohol along with many other incredibly questionable tactics. These actions are depicted through a series of mini-games that determine your success in bedding the woman in question. Overall, you'll get what you want, but this isn't really a game you should be proud of when you succeed at that.