Thanks to some quick-working dataminers, we now have a look at the next 11 characters that will be added to Dr. Mario World on iOS and Android. A list and image of the characters, complete in their doctor's outfits, was posted to Twitter earlier today.
The characters are all the standard Mushroom Kingdom residents we've come to expect in new Mario games, no wacky curve balls like Monty Mole in the Super Mario Party. There are, however, a few character that beg the question: are they really qualified to be doctors?
First up, we've got the gruesome duesome Wario and Waluigi. This article could really stop here because Waluigi is the best character in any game ever full stop. You'll just have to ignore the ethics concerns presented with these two scallywags taking the Hippocratic oath. If Mario and Luigi can be doctors than surely their bizarro twins (are they cousins?) are just as qualified.
The next pair, Princess Daisy and Rosalina, are fine candidates for the noblest profession as well. Though, Daisy's father probably paid to get her into medical school, she is a princess after all. Rosalina, on the other hand, has God powers that she uses to protect the cosmos, you'd think she'd have better things to do than fight germs.
Here's where things start to get a little iffy: Donkey Kong and Diddy Kong. Both upstanding individuals to be certain, and heroic adventurers no doubt, but come on. Imagine Donkey Kong pulling a privacy curtain shut behind you so he can tell your father how long he has to live. At least Diddy has the added benefit of using his tail as an extra hand in surgery, but I seriously don't want any monkey doctors. I don't think they wash their hands.
Here's the big issue: the 4 babies get to be doctors! Dr. Baby Mario (or is it Baby Dr. Mario?) Baby Luigi, Baby Peach, and Baby Daisy are without a doubt the most adorable doctors, but seriously? If you've got a binky in your mouth, I'm not taking any advice from you about my psoriasis. These kids can't even walk. Are we really expected to pay $5 an hour for this?
And finally, sigh, that brings us to Dr. Luma. What can be said about Dr. Luma? She has no hands. She can't write a prescription, she can't take your temperature, is there any thing in the doctor's job description she can do? I'm dubious. Perhaps she'd be better off as Rosalina's assistant. No offense to Luma, I just don't see her even finishing her residency.
Dr. Mario World is available today for free on Android and iOS. We don't know when the new characters will be added, but there are several to collect in the game already, including the lovable Dr. Ludwig.