The Dark Souls series is known in gaming for a lot of things. It has deep, interesting lore that is hidden in cryptic item descriptions and scant dialogue, devastating weapons, and magic to give you a fighting chance. Not to mention the game's beautifully rich and winding environments that link together in unexpected ways — and crushing difficulty that sends casuals away in a sprint as soon as someone starts praising the sun. The best thing about the Souls series, in my humble hated opinion, is the enemy and creature design.
The beasties that players have to face are creepy, enchanting, and extremely deadly. There are some that stand out above the rest, however, and they're so powerful and fearsome that they could easily end the world. Either complete annihilation of the planet, or just wiping us out as a species, the designers at From Software aren't shy about creating nightmare fuel that could wipe us from the earth liked a smashed bug off a windshield. Grab your Estus Flask and praise the sun, because these are the fifteen Dark Souls Creatures So Powerful They Could End The World.
Quite possibly the most pants poopingly scary creature in the whole series, Garvelord Nito is the lord of death, something that can, to put it lightly, affect humans rather fatally. Literally, Nito exists to spread Death as much as he can, and we would obviously not be spared. Considering that he’s the lord of the dead, every one of us that he puts down is going to pop right back up, able only to follow his commands and miraculously put ourselves back together.
Even though death is an inevitable guarantee for all living things, Nito would definitely speed up the process. He has incredible reach with his blade, a posse of skeleton warriors to aid him, and he can pick you up and totally toss you around like a rag doll.
Souls fan favorites that often get a bad wrap after people beat them. Most will talk about how they’re so easy, how they’re able to breeze past them on subsequent playthroughs. Well, good for you liar. No one breezes past this fearsome duo the first time around. When you realize that you’re going to fight both of them at the same time, you start to wonder how many controllers you’ll have to buy, in light of smashing them continuously.
In the real world, we’re totally done for. Both Smough and Ornstein can fight together or separately, and if you defeat one, the other imbues its powers and goes into a full-fledged berserk mode. If you thought they were hard to defeat in Dark Souls, imagine having to deal with that electrified butt pound in real life.
One of the most aesthetically intimidating bosses in the series, the Old Iron King really isn’t that much of a threat once you figure out how to anticipate his melee attacks. That means easy for characters in the Dark Souls series, Knights, Mages, Assassins, etc. There aren’t many real world people that could stand up to the Old Iron King in the modern world, far less that would have any sort of impact on its defeat.
The Old Iron King deals massive damage with his melee attacks and can breath fire, in addition to being a towering demon made of flame and melting metal. You’ve seen how the whole giant monster thing works out for humanity; our futile attempts at defense are merely a footnote to our inevitable extinction.
I think every Souls player’s reaction to the smaller crabs in Dark Souls 3 was just about the same; pity before cutting them down mercilessly. Now, I also think that every Souls player had the same reaction when the Great Crab appeared for the first time, incredibly pissed off for your nonchalant killing of its young, which was bolting the other way. Why are they so fast? And what is that bubbly crap they spit out all over you? Why From Software? Why?
Humanity would probably be pretty easily overrun by the smaller crabs. Comparatively, in the real world, they’d be about the size of a miniature horse. Yeah, no way I’d mess with a crab that big. And if I did, I’d suddenly have a crab the size of a freaking school bus chasing me down and trying to spit all over me. We'd become human cakes for our crab overlords in no time.
While not really seeming like much in the greater scheme of Dark Souls 3, an encounter with an Elder Ghru can turn real ugly, real quick. They’re towering, animal like tree things. They're super pissed off and super powerful. They’re able to attack with the remains of a large tree that they turn into a weapon and summon legions of floating skulls to pester you while you desperately try and roll around them. Their attacks are powerful, they move swiftly for as large as they are, and they will put you down real fast.
When we’re talking about real world application, Elder Ghrus would most likely start in forested areas, which if we’re projecting this outbreak happening in the States, Elder Ghrus are all over the east and west coast. After they take care of the little resistance presented there, they move inwards, slowly turning the cleared land back into forest. Eventually, all the landmasses that can support vegetation do, in the form of Elder Ghrus.
These things freak me the hell out. Fat, piggish bodies covered in course long hairs all give way to a head that is a hand with teeth in the palm, and a belly that’s covered in eyes. First off, let's admit that seeing one of these would make you hightail it back home, no exceptions. Sure, they’re slow, but they can take damage like a tank and deal out massive amounts of it when they do their flopping around. Plus, they’d be falling all over the writhing mass of humanity, gobbling people up in those horribly toothed hand-mouths.
Sure, when you find them in Dark Souls 3, they’re usually asleep, meaning you can just slip right by them unnoticed. In our world, which is a lot louder than a world full of dead warriors and slumbering monsters, these things would be constantly awake, flopping and eating our species right out of existence.
While this one may seem like a serious noob choice, give me a second to explain myself. Skeleton warriors found throughout the catacombs will keep coming back to life unless you kill one of the numerous strategically placed Undead Mages that will resurrect them endlessly. While this is a minor nuisance when running through the Catacombs, in a real world scenario the threat becomes much more apparent.
If the Undead Mages hid themselves appropriately, we’d be looking at an invincible army of skeleton warriors, the likes of which our fat and submissive species would do little to keep up with. Could you imagine having to dodge that damn corkscrew dive attack in real life?
Slow moving, weird looking, and at first, not very threatening. You’ll see one off in the distance, probably after seeing a few of its smaller mushroom children, and you may think that you are relatively safe. Well, you would be wrong. The mushroom parents are some of the most deceiving enemies in the Dark Souls universe; while they may look slow, stupid, and somewhat harmless, they can end your life pretty quick if you’re not careful.
Think about how rapidly mushrooms and other types of fungi grow in our world. Now apply the mushroom parent to that formula, and you see why they would easily be able to destroy the world. Could you imagine walking out of your house and having to navigate through a sea of these slow moving beasts, only to be caught with a rouge punch that sends you to your death?
Thankfully, there are only a few of these crocodile/wolf hybrids in Dark Souls 3; they are some of the most difficult and frustratingly annoying enemies to fight in the entire series. Not only are they agile, ferocious, and downright terrifying, they spit lightning and can take a whole lot of damage before they go down.
If a few of these suddenly showed up in the real world, things would go south pretty darn quick. They would be snapping people up and yacking lightning on pretty much everyone, while avoiding most of our defenses and simply shaking off the rest. Nowhere is safe when we’re dealing with these reptilian wolves, and we'd all become snacks in a heartbeat — even with our best efforts to avoid them.
A descendant of the everlasting dragons that can be found in the Depths near the entrance to Blight Town, the Gaping Dragon is the grotesque centipede looking lizard with an exposed ribcage. I remember when it first popped its head out I figured it would be a crocodile of some sort…until I started yelling because of the disgustingly elongated body and exposed bone. What’s even in that ribcage anyway? It looks like a sea anemone with bleached tips.
Its appearance would be enough to send most people underground for the foreseeable future, but in case anyone wanted to fight it, it has more than a few defensive moves up its sleeve. It would throw countless people into its exposed…gape. Moreoever, it can emit that sludge that makes weapons brittle, and can somewhat fly. We’d be screwed.
Probably the most unfortunately named boss in the Souls series, the Ceaseless Discharge is one of the more imposing bosses in the first game. Sure, you can cheese him, but for all intents and purposes, let's say that you can’t. So you now have a hulking mass of fire tendrils that lumber around, spewing fire and destruction with ease. Plus, he can take a lot of damage, no matter what you throw at him.
This thing walking around modern day earth would take us out in the matter of a few days. He’d be able to set pretty much everything on fire, and that would definitely include people. Massive, powerful, and able to turn most things to ash with just a touch, we’d surely be doomed.
God, I hate this cat. Pretty much a giant Siberian Tiger, once you figure out the trick, in this case finding a key item that renders it visible, it’s not incredibly difficult. But, it still would rend our entire population limb from limb.
Considering that only the creatures are crossing over into the real world, not the items associated with them, this would be a giant invisible Siberian Tiger. Normal tigers kill scores of people every year, what’s to say we’d stand a chance against an incredibly agile, magic casting, invisible one? Not much. It could take down people on foot like a regular tiger would (read: mauling and eating them), and would be able to obliterate any kind of defense with its magic attacks. Yeah, we’d be so screwed.
Starting out as “King of The Storm,” the Nameless King comes at you on the back of a giant feathered drake that breaths fire and flies circles around you, making him difficult to down. The Nameless King doesn’t just sit idle on the neck of his drake though; he rains down lightning bolts while in flight and cuts you to ribbons with a massive spear. Once you’re able to down his mount, he imbues his spear with the power of lightning and begins to utterly kick your ass back to the nearest bonfire.
So we’re talking double threat here: a giant, fire-breathing feathered drake, which alone could take us out without much of a fight. Coupled with a lightning-throwing dude mounted on him, who, if we somehow figured out how to take down the drake, would dismount and proceed to turn everyone into an electrified kebab.
More commonly known as “OHGODWHATTHEHELLISTHATTHING,” Deep Accursed is, thankfully, a rare beast found in Dark Souls 3. You’re probably most familiar with the one that drops from the ceiling in the Cleansing Chapel, after you pick up an ember, turn around, and promptly poop your pants. Resembling a lion with glowing eyes and a spider’s body, the Deep Accursed are powerful, agile enemies straight out of mankind’s collective nightmares.
They’re quick, spit poison, and have little time to waste with your amateur ass. Deep Accursed often drop onto the scene when it’s least expected, meaning that most of us, distracted, out of shape meat bags, would be taken out with little problem. Plus, they’re just damn creepy. If you don’t die of a fear-induced heart attack, you’ll definitely be killed by its quick, powerful move set.
Probably the most infuriating enemy ever dreamed up by a video game designer, Mimics are the infamous toothed treasure chests that inhabit the world of Dark Souls, waiting for greedy masochists to try and open them. Any Souls player will know the horror of erroneously trying to open a chest before smacking it with your weapon or failing to recognize the telltale breathing or chain pointing towards you, indicators that let you know you’re about to become a heavily armored gum ball.
While easy to spot for the initiated, the majority of the world would fail to check their treasure chests for signs of being a lumbering, long-limbed beast. Greed is one of the easiest shortcomings to play on, so we’d see most of the population wiped out in a few days, at most. Once the mimics get hungry enough, they’re going to sprout those ghastly limbs and come looking for us. You might as well just give yourself up early and cover yourself in barbecue sauce before you go treasure hunting.