I’ve written about fashion, photography, and how they intersect with video games a few times before, so New Pokemon Snap is a big deal to me, especially as someone who has also written about Pokemon a helluva lot before. This has me thinking about not only the creatures I want to see in New Pokemon Snap - we all just want to see our favourites, duh - but about which belong there. Which ones are the most photogenic - which ones need to have their visage captured on camera.
When most people think about the most photogenic Pokemon, they think about… how can I say this delicately… the ones they want to have sex with. That means ‘mons like Gardevoir, Lopunny, Machamp, and Goodra might spring to mind, along with the more traditionally cute ones like Milotic, Sylveon, and Ponyta. But this isn’t really what photogenic means. That’s just being pretty. And when you think of the supermodels of the world, pretty doesn’t always describe them. They’re never ugly, but they usually have something distinct about them. Something that elevates them above being just ridiculously good looking. Think Cara Delevingne with her thick eyebrows, Georgia May Jagger with her teeth, or Souffrant Ralph’s freckles. They are some of the most photogenic people on earth, but they don’t necessarily fit within an idealised view of beauty. That’s why I put it to you that Bruxish is actually the most photogenic Pokemon, and I will riot if it’s not in New Pokemon Snap.
Bruxish is a Water/Psychic Pokemon introduced in Gen 7, and it defies description. I can explain each of the individual elements, but I’ll throw a picture up too so you can see them in their full glory. All of its parts make sense on their own, it’s once you put them together that things go off the rails a little. It has long, thick eyelashes that flutter upwards, with thick, plump lips. You’d think that would make it a picture of Pokemon beauty, like a wet Gardevoir. Actually, forget I said that. Anyway, this sultry combination is paired with razor sharp teeth, demonic eyes, and psychedelic colour scheme that Jimi Hendrix might have thought was a bit much. Its shiny also looks like a slice of cheese pizza. It’s glorious.
I know there are much prettier and far cuter Pokemon out there, and I know that if there’s a Gardevoir or a Lopunny or a Goodra in New Pokemon Snap, they’ll look beautiful in their mini photoshoot. But unless they do something particularly interesting, I’ll likely forget them as soon as I’ve snapped them. Pokemon haslots of cute stars, but I’d love to see the more interesting ones get the spotlight here. I’ve already written about the way Snapuses Pyukumuku in the trailer suggests we're going to get some spotlight on the less popular but more visually interesting Pokemon that have been held back by a poor or overcrowded type pool, bad stats, or a lack of discoverability in the main games. Bruxish ticks all of those boxes, and it's such a great photography subject to boot. Come on, New Pokemon Snap. Don't let me down.