The Mario Kart line-up always tends to be like Super Smash Bros. Ultimate. Everyone is here. From downright confusing picks like the Honey Queen from Mario Kart 7 (which brings up so many questions) to the surprise of R.O.B. for Mario Kart DS, one can always expect the unexpected in these rosters.
However, Mario Kart 8 decided to forgo any fun picks in order to include every single Koopaling and Pink Gold Peach, much to the… delight of fans. Today, we’ll be going over ten additions to a hypothetical Mario Kart 9 that would be a ton of fun. Let’s jump into it.
Due to her recent popularity spike from her inclusion in Super Mario Odyssey, Pauline could be a likely addition to a new Mario Kart roster. New Donk City will be fine without a mayor, she has important go-kart racing to do.
She was recently included in Mario Tennis Aces as DLC, meaning there certainly is a precedent for her to arrive in a different spinoff. Considering that most of the cast isn’t even human nowadays, her introduction to the series would be a welcomed one.
Wiggler was added into Mario Kart 7 as a playable character, and the poor boy hasn’t returned since, which is an actual disaster. Wigglers are the sweetest Mario enemy there is, just living their happy lives until they’re mistreated by Mario and friends.
His addition to Mario Kart 7 was certainly a surprise, but a nice one. Hopefully, we see these angry little boys make a return when Mario Kart 9 comes around.
The Birdo erasure that has been going on in the past few years is a CRIME. Bring her back! That’s right, while Birdo used to be a staple in most Mario spin-offs, she’s been absent quite a lot recently.
She likely lost her spot in Mario Kart 8 to the 63 Koopalings that all had to have their own spot in the roster. Birdo is such a weird character, but she has more than made her mark on the Mario franchise. Let’s see her make her grand return in a new Mario Kart game. She’s earned it.
7 Funky Kong
The elected President Funky Kong of Mario Kart Wii must make a comeback when Mario Kart 9 rolls around. This Kong member was most recently featured in Donkey Kong Country: Tropical Freeze for the Nintendo Switch, where he had his own brand new Funky Mode.
Mario Kart 9 needs its own Funky Mode too. Featuring Dante from the Devil May Cry series, of course. If one would like to replace Funky with Lanky though, that would be just fine.
6 E. Gadd
This crazy inventor (who, after reading some theories could be incredibly evil, look into it) would mesh perfectly with the Mario Kart roster, and having him in 9 would be a blast. With him this character could bring all sorts of different karts to the mix too, which would be tons of fun to play around with.
A new Luigi’s Mansion track is never a bad time either. Plus, cross-promotion with Luigi’s Mansion 3. Come on, you almost have to include this man. It’s marketing 101.
With the introduction of new guest characters into the series, Kirby would work great as a brand new kart racer in Mario Kart 9. We already have reps from The Legend of Zelda, Splatoon and Animal Crossing in Mario Kart 8 Deluxe, so adding Kirby to the roster really wouldn’t be too tough.
The only concern with Kirby is his arm length. Can he even reach the steering wheel? Or pedals for that matter? His karts could come custom-fitted. Even if that is necessary, seeing Kirby in a new Mario Kart game is essential to the emotional stability of gamers everywhere.
4 Dixie Kong
A new Kong in the roster wouldn’t be a bad addition to Mario Kart 9 at all. Recently, the only Kong we’ve had in the series is Donkey Kong, with no new introductions since Funky in Wii.
Dixie is arguably 3rd in line to inherit Kong Island, so having her in a new Mario Kart is not a stretch at all. Besides, considering the only female characters in Mario Kart 8 are 7 different versions of Peach, a new female rep (even a monkey) would be welcomed.
3 Probably More Babies
Let’s be real. Obviously. This isn’t a matter of who needs to be added, but rather who will be added. Baby Pauline would likely make the cut before actual Pauline. Does it make much sense that we are padding out our driving game rosters with babies?
No. Are we going to continue doing it? Absolutely we are. Baby Donkey Kong, Baby Cat Peach, Baby Dry Bowser, Baby Isabelle, Baby Ash Ketchum. The unfortunate possibilities really are endless, aren’t they?
The thief Nabbit has apparently become a main series Mario character for some reason, so he’ll obviously become a Mario Kart addition sooner rather than later. I mean, the man has played golf with the crew before, this is no surprise.
All of this is not necessarily a bad thing though. The character has a fun enough design, so adding him into Mario Kart could be a great addition to the roster. Hey, at least it isn’t another Koopaling. There are things to be thankful for.
1 Diddy Kong
The final addition that should come to Mario Kart 9 is Diddy Kong. Who was once the face of a rival kart racing game before he was robbed of that title, he has appeared in a few Mario Kart titles before this, so adding him in wouldn’t be a stretch.
The Donkey Kong side of the Mario universe could certainly use a few more reps. Let both Diddy and Dixie join the fray in Mario Kart 9. They’ve certainly earned a place on the roster.