In just about any fictional setting, anyone who fancies themselves a monster hunter is pretty much required to be armed to the teeth to hunt their prey. This goes double, if not triple, in a setting like Choo-Choo Charles, where the prey in question is a gigantic spider-legged steam engine with a mouthful of needle-like gnashing teeth.
When you're engaged in a battle with such a bizarre and horrifying creature, you can't afford to be reserved about it. You need anything and everything that could possibly give you an edge or, failing that, at least make your imminent death-by-train look a lot cooler.
8 Paint Cans
Okay, obviously, aesthetics are not the primary concern when pursuing a spider-legged train monster. The important thing is that you can kill it before it kills you, and everything else is kind of immaterial. That said, if you can do the deed while decked out in your favorite primary colors, is there any reason not to?
Around the island, usually in locked chests, you can find cans of paint that can be applied to your personal train for a touch of customization. Does it make you better at fighting Charles? No. But does it make you feel closer to your little engine of destruction? Absolutely.
7 Derailer
The Derailer is a classic heavy machine gun, and the first gun that you find mounted to your personal train in the shed at the beginning of the game. While you swiftly learn that it's not the ideal weapon for battling against Charles, that doesn't mean it's useless.
The Derailer is a great workhorse weapon for mopping up non-Charles enemies, like the various masked mooks that guard the island's mines. All you need to do is lure them to your train, hop on the gunner platform, and it's open season.
6 Speed
Upgrading your train's speed with scrap should be one of your primary focuses at the start of the game, both for the sake of survivability and practicality. When Charles comes charging out of the mist, you're going to need to storm down those tracks in a hurry if you don't want to get your proverbial butt eaten off, after all.
In addition to that, though, higher speed makes it easier to get around the island quickly, and considering the amount of rail-riding you have to do in this game, you'll be thankful for shorter trips later on in your playthrough.
5 Bug Spray
Few things are better are cleansing evil from this world than a belly full o' flames, that's for sure. The Bug Spray is a mounted weapon for your train that, when activated, fires off a short, yet powerful stream of intense flames.
The Bug Spray is a vital tool for keeping Charles off your back during your travels. While it doesn't do much damage, Charles will freak out when you set him ablaze, slowing down in his pursuits and making it easier to shake him off your tail.
4 Damage
The ultimate goal of Choo-Choo Charles is to lure the beast into a one-on-one duel to the death. As the old adage goes, the best way to win an argument is to be the loudest, which is why upgrading your train's overall damage is a must.
In the last few encounters with Charles, you'll both be engaged in a concentrated DPS race to total the other before you get totaled yourself. With a higher damage rating (not to mention better weapons), you can put the screws to Charles before your own health goes critical.
3 Boomer
Bullets and fire are nice and all, but when it comes to hunting unspeakable horrors, sometimes things just have to go boom. The Boomer is a train-mounted rocket launcher, sacrificing the rapid firing action of the Derailer for the sheer offensive might of explosive ordinance.
A few hot tamales to the face from this little number are more than enough to get Charles off your case while you're in transit, and one of the most useful weapons in your ultimate duel besides. Just make sure you get your aim down pat before you start launching rockets.
2 Armor
A DPS race has two important factors: offense and defense. As we mentioned, dealing the most damage possible to Charles is important in the final battle, but it's equally important to shore up your train's armor rating.
Having higher armor on your train means attacks from Charles and his flunkies don't dent it as much. Besides keeping you alive longer, this also means you don't need to burn as much scrap on constant repairs, which becomes even more important during the final battle when Charles pulls out all the stops.
1 Bob
The majority of the island's residents have been trying to cook up ways to kill Charles for ages, and one of them came quite close before he ended up being eaten. Bob, the strongest train-mounted weapon in the game, is named in that brave individual's honor.
Bob may seem like another machine gun, but it's so much more than that. It's a rapid-action anti-tank rifle, built with the express purpose of firing the biggest, baddest armor-piercing rounds as quickly as possible. No other weapon guarantees Charles gets his daily iron intake quite like good ol' Bob.