Clever writing, memorable characters, and a believable plot—these ubiquitous elements go a long way in immersing players in the worlds of their favorite video games. But, just like gaming’s popular siblings, film and TV, there’s more to modern entertainment’s redheaded step-kid than the elements that developers leave in. Sometimes, the most compelling stuff is what developers leave out—what they leave unexplained. What they… just, you know, forget. Oops.

Plot holes can either derail an engaging gaming experience, totally imploding a player’s emotional investment—or they can pull them in further, forcing them to fill in gaps in logic with their own unique theories. Call these fan theories “headcanon,” call them “unfounded hootenanny,” call them the seeds of terrible, X-rated fanfiction… No matter what you call them, these interpretations are the closest gamers come to collaborating with their favorite game developers—and fueling their own journey through worlds filled with princesses that need saving, extradimensional horrors, fire-breathing dragons, and the knights who love to slay them.

Sometimes, however, the knights don’t do the slaying—sometimes, the knights were dead the whole time. Sometimes, the dragon is the princess’s son. And sometimes, the extra-dimensional horror is a fetus in desperate need of a dose of Roe v. Wade, courtesy of time-traveling teens.

Put on your tinfoil hats, kiddies—it’s time for 15 creepy theories about your favorite Nintendo games.

15 Fake News Blues

via: sf.co.au

I think we can all agree that there’s something just a little “off” about our favorite ex-plumber and his beloved princess-in-pink. Nobody can win every time—nobody can save the precious princess every time. Unless, of course, the Mushroom Kingdom is feeding its loyal denizens a big ol’ steaming pile of bul—erm, I mean, “alternative facts.”

Ever since Shigeru Miyamoto himself claimed that the Super Mario Bros. cast may very well be a troupe of actors, the long-celebrated fan theory that Nintendo’s flagship franchise is nothing more than a series of plays has only gained traction. Well, if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that all art is political whether you realize it or not. Thus, every single Super Mario Bros. game is pro-Princess Peach, anti-Bowser propaganda.

Think about it—every main game in the franchise more or less depicts the same conflict. In the end, Bowser is dispatched, but isn’t it strange that Bowser’s motivation is never fully explained? Isn’t it peculiar that he’s portrayed as such a villain while Peach—a political power with the fate of an entire kingdom weighing on her surely-burdened shoulders—is portrayed as such a, well, peach?

14 Making A (Pocket) Monster

via: jrcoffron.darkfolio.com/

From the mysterious Vermillion City Harbor truck to the Ditto-is-a-failed-Mew-clone conspiracy, Pokémon is a franchise that’s notorious for its fair share of disturbing theories. Ever since the ominous Missingno graced our Game Boy screens, armchair sleuths have lost hours scouring the many regions of the Poké-verse in search of the latest harebrained postulation. One example, you ask? Oh, maybe a theory alleging that your favorite sentient, smoldering fart-craters, Koffing and Weezing, are the result of failed experiments to synthesize ghost types by Team Rocket.

Now, that may sound like an absurd notion concocted by a nutjob—and that might be because it is. But it’s not my job to judge the foolish musings of my fellow gamers—it’s just my job to report them.

Bear with me: First off, ghost types are the perfect criminals—they can pass through walls and phase out of sight at an instant’s notice. So it’s reasonable to assume that Team Rocket would seek to profit from their creepy capabilities. Second, in the original games, the pair of malformed misfits could only be caught in Pokémon Mansion, an abandoned lab. Finally, the symbol on the gassy Gastly wannabes’ stomachs?—necks?—is a skull and cross bones. A human symbol.

TL;DR: somebody done goofed.

13 Hello Darkness, My Old Friend

via: gamespot.com tagyhag)

From a young age, we know to fear the dark. It represents the unknown—that which is just beyond our ability to perceive. We are taught that this is a defense mechanism. We are taught that this is survival instinct. So when we loaded up Super Mario Galaxy, made our jolly way to Shiverburn Galaxy for another intergalactic joyride with our bestest buddy Mario, little did we expect to be greeted by three lurching horrors looming from the side of a tall cliff.

They just stared from their kingdom of darkness, hollow eyes unflinching as they analyzed our every motion, collecting our nightmares, slipping them like greasy marbles into little bags to be traded for the souls of child prisoners at the underground blood-sewer marketplace.

Many an amateur P.I. has dug deep into Super Mario Bros. lore in a futile attempt to unearth the true nature of the pleasantly named (and not at all reminiscent of Lovecraftian horrors) “Hell Valley Sky Trees.” The popular theory? Demons. They’re demons. Or, sorry, “kodama.” Like the demons—sorry, “kodama”—from Super Mario 3D Land’s Level 4-4.

12 Happy Hell Designer

via: mynintendonews.com

Speaking of “child prisoners,” let’s talk about Animal Crossing. It goes like this: Every citizen in your village in Animal Crossing is a member of a child-abducting cult, and you are their latest prisoner-slave.

You see, beloved turtle Kapp’n, the joyful, singing driver who shuttles you to the village/city/nightmare-scape is not a turtle at all, you fool. He’s actually—and keep in mind that this is canon in the Japanese games—a mythological river imp called a “kappa” (super original naming, I know). Kappa are mischievous spirits whose hobbies include irrigating fields, munching on cucumbers, and—OH YEAH—literally eating people’s butts, maiming animals, and kidnapping children.

I repeat: Kidnapping. Children. Ever wonder why you’re immediately thrust into a mountain of debt upon arriving at your new “home?” That’s called indentured servitude, my friend. Enjoy your never-ending suffering at the hands of talking bipedal animal-human hybrids.

Sorry for ruining Animal Crossing for you. It’s a habit. I’m working on it.

11 Cle-scary

via: youtube.com (Epic Rap Battles of Pokemon)

Remember that supa kawaii Pokémon episode where, like, it turns out Clefairy are aliens. And, then, remember when you realized that none of that mattered—that, like, man, nothing matters—because you immediately took one look at Gengar and was all, huh—that is definitely, definitely Clefable’s ghost or shadow or, like, evil doppelgänger?

Because I do.

Just look at these two—same body shape, same arms and hands, similar feet and toes. Sure, Clefable has a curly hair and that poofy tail, but Gengar—the “shadow Pokémon,” according to a number of Pokédex entries—wears his in a spike because he’s edgy as heck, son. Rumor has it Clefable and Gengar were two of the earliest Pokémon to be designed—and another rumor also has it that Gengar’s name is a shortening of the word “doppelgänger,” which, taken from old-timey German, literally means “double-goer.” Add to that the fact that Clefable (being a normal type) and Gengar (being a ghost type) are immune to many of one another’s attacks, and dang, is that a spoopy theory or what?

You spooped? I’m spooped.

10 Kirby: Scourge Of The Wastes

via: deviantart.com (Lal

Post-apocalyptic video games are like potato chips—one’s just never enough. And maybe they’re a little greasy… and they can be just a little too salty. And they make you feel kind of gross after just diving in there. But you can’t stop. You just. Keep. Coming. Back. Luckily, Nintendo’s lighthearted Kirby 64: The Crystal Shards is a cheerful, albeit slightly dated, alternative to the bleak, moody wastes that await you in games like Fallout, The Last of Us, and NieR: Automata.

Just kidding. Humanity is extinct. The world is frozen in a perpetual nuclear winter. And everyone you know and love is dead. Hurray for Nintendo's light-hearted sensibilities!

The theory goes: the Shiver Star level is a post-apocalyptic Earth. Our planet—this planet, complete with malls, factories, remnants of robotic technology, and single moon that continues to orbit our dead world. No biggie… except for the fact that Kirby is a playable character in the Smash Bros. series. And he fights alongside human characters that, one must assume, are long-dead in his own personal timeline. Yup, Kirby is fighting against—or alongside—popsicle people from a frozen wasteland. They’re nothing more than ghosts—nothing more than stories, fables—to the pink marshmallow munchkin.

Give that a minute to sink in, and tell me you don’t feel a pang of guilt the next time you up and swallow Ryu or Snake whole. Yeesh.

9 Mommy Mushroom

via: deviantart.com (CuteyTCat)

If it isn’t already obvious from its numerous appearances on this list, the Super Mario Bros. franchise is no stranger to kooky theories. Some of them are innocent enough—like the theory that Yoshi is, in fact, a Pokémon. Some, on the other hand, are the exact opposite of “innocent” in every way that your human mind can possibly fathom. I don’t really want to dive too deep into this one. The thought of it—well, it just gives me the creeps. How do they even… I don’t—their parts shouldn’t—

Some freaks out in the wild, wacky interwebs like to, ahem, screw around with Super Mario Bros. lore. They’re of the, erm, position that Bowser Jr’s mother is none other than resident pretty, pretty Princess Peach. Honestly, the notion really... blows my mind.

The theory is about as possible as it is lobotomy-inducing. They do spend an awful lot of time together, those two. They are political opponents from warring territories. And there’s a fine line between hate and lust.

Still, that’s… How—I don’t—

8 Kanga-Gone

via: deviantart.com (000Fesbra000)

If you’ve ever caught a Cubone, chances are its Pokédex entry struck a chord: “It always wears the skull of its dead mother, so no one has any idea what its hidden face looks like.” Soul-crushing—and a little peculiar, right?

You’d think that, due to its evolutionary stages, Cubone’s mother would be a Marowak. But that suggests a tri-fact-a: every single Cubone evolves into a Marowak before it gives birth, every single Marowak dies after rearing a Cubone—but before said Cubone becomes a Marowak—and every resulting Cubone wears its mother’s head like the sad weirdo it is.

Look at Marowak—now look at Cubone. It’s close, but it’s not the same skull. Kangaskhan, on the other hand...

Let me be clear: if there’s one theory on this list that I will back until my dying breath, it’s this one. Kangaskhan mommies who die before their l’il Kangas grow to adolescence leave behind a skull—and their future-Hot-Topic-card-carrying babies promptly wear said skulls in mournful tribute. This results in the evolution of baby Kangaskhan into Cubone—kinda like how Shellder plus Slowpoke equals Slowbro. But way, way more depressing.

7 The Great Dead-ku Tree

via: zelda.wikia.com

This next one’s a doozy. We all know that events of The Legend of Zelda series takes place across a confusing grid of branching timelines, with multiple incarnations of the hero Link, semi-canonical sequels (and prequels), and—alternate… universes…? Honestly, I don’t even know. But who cares? We love The Legend of Zelda because it’s fun, it’s challenging, and it’s a chronicle of the exciting adventures of a brave, kind-hearted hero—and that one time he accidentally commited retroactive genocide.

One Redditor who just wanted to ruin all of our fun came up with an “explanation” about why we never see the Great Deku Tree in games that take place further down the separate child Link timeline established by The Ocarina of Time. You see, some fans consider The Ocarina of Time the point where the timelines branch off.

To make a long story short, in the adult Link timeline, which features the Great Deku Tree in later games, said tree is replanted, and the Kokiri go on to thrive. If you’ve ever wondered why the Kokiri and the Great Deku Tree don’t pop up in games like Majora’s Mask and Twilight Princess, which allegedly take place in the child Link timeline, that’s because…

...Link totally drove his childhood friends and their entire race to extinction by neglecting to replant the Great Deku in The Ocarina of Time.

6 Tragedy Aboard The S.S. Anne

via: youtube.com Vangaard)

This one's been done to death (no pun intended), but I felt like I haven’t hammered this into your head yet: Pokémon. Is. All. About. Mortality. Want another example? Ok. You asked for it.

In the Red and Blue versions, you kill your rival’s beloved Raticate aboard the S.S. Anne. The next time you come across him in the Tim Burton-esque Lavender Town, you don’t even give him time to mourn before beating him into the ground again. All he’s wanted to do since the start of the game was impress his grandfather, Professor Oak—who, just in case you forgot, couldn’t even remember his own grandson’s freakin’ name. Your rival just wants to prove that he is just as capable as you. He trains hard, day in and day out, and he finally pummels all of the gym leaders and reaches the Indigo League, where… he is crushed again. By you.

Where you receive praise, your rival is scorned. Where you have a loving mother, your rival has no one. He had a Raticate. Past tense. So maybe you’re a champion—maybe you’re “the best there ever was.” But you’re also a monster, and you should feel ashamed of yourself.

5 Head In The Clouds

via: starfox.wikia.com

The Star Fox universe is weird enough without drugs. But add controlled substances to the mix and you get a whole mess o’ strange. Kind of like the “Out of This Dimension” level in the original 1993 SNES game. And, also, kind of like the prevailing fan theory: that the whole thing is one big drug trip.

One dedicated YouTuber dove headfirst into a theory that explains this bizarre easter egg of an alternative ending. Here’s the gist: Fox McCloud, reeling from a combination grief stemming from his father’s untimely death at the hands of Andross and the pressure of playing savior to the Lylat system, turns to uppers as both a way to cope with his bottomless stress and stay awake during those long Arwing flights.

This YouTube theorist takes his claim even one step further, suggesting that “Out of This Dimension” represents not only Fox’s poorly-timed drug trip, but, potentially, his succumbing to his drug addiction while Andross lays waste to the Lylat system.

4 Your Soul For A Bag Of Gold

via: sonicexe.net

Video games love their currency. Whether players are provided the opportunity to trade their hard-earned dough for items a la Resident Evil 4 or these virtual equivalents of dollah-dollah-bills act as a measure of your health like Sonic The Hedgehog’s signature rings, collectable currencies are a ubiquitous feature of many popular games—and coins are among the most common. The Super Mario Bros. games are no exception to this universal truth—save for the fact that those aren’t coins at all. They’re souls.

Really think about this one. It explains why fire flower attacks release “coins,” but not standard jump-attacks—because, during the former, an enemy’s body is burned up and his soul is forced out of his physical vessel. It even explains why certain bricks—which, get ready for this, are actually former Mushroom Kingdom inhabitants according to the original Super Mario Bros. instruction manual—produce coins when smashed. You. Are. Taking. Lives.

Why would collecting 100 coins extend your life? They wouldn’t—that’s stupid. Collecting 100 souls on the other hand legit sounds like some chaotic-neutral Daedric side quest straight outta Skyrim.

3 Bye Bye, Baby

via: knowyourmeme.com

Here, have another nightmare-inducing theory: SNES cult hit JRPG EarthBound features a sequence where Ness and his pals travel back through time to abort a genocidal alien named Giygas before he can wreak havoc on all of reality, plunging it into darkness. Now, I personally think this theory holds zero truth... if you ignore the fact that the Devil’s Machine does sorta look like a set of reproductive organs. And the fact that, when Pokey releases Giygas from the Devil’s Machine, the cosmic horror seeps into a new dimension that does resemble a series of fetuses floating amongst twisted scowls of horror...

Look, I’m not one to avoid grim gaming moments. In fact, the creepier, the better, IMO. But, call me crazy, there’s something about traveling back in time to, ahem, “terminate” an otherworldly entity before he’s born that just… puts me off a bit. It’s like putting Anakin Skywalker down before he could succumb to the grip of the Sith—he’s still a kid. Why not go back in time and help mold him into a kinder, gentler alien monstrosity from outside of time?

2 High Strung

via: youtube.com Gaming Reinvented)

Glitches are funny things—depending on the aesthetic error, they can inspire belly-busting hilarity or fearful, nervous laughter. You'd think a Nintendo game that treats supernatural torment with tongue-in-cheek humor like Luigi's Mansion would boast similarly source-appropriate graphical hang-ups—but you'd be wrong.

After a boss battle results in a blackout, Luigi ventures to the Telephone room. While he's speaking to the caller, a strike of lightning illuminates the room for the briefest moment—casting the shadow of an elevated Luigi, hands hanging at his sides. As if—oh, I don't know—he's swaying from a beam in the ceiling. Nintendo has stated that this theory is false. Instead, they claim that the glitch is the result of a dynamic shadow system that rendered Luigi's silhouette based on his default 3D model rather than his telephone-answering pose.

Riiiiiiight...

1 The Depths Of Depravity

via: youtube.com Professor TayTay)

Splatoon is a pretty political game. From rising sea levels that likely led to human extinction (a recurring theme, it seems) to resource wars that forced entire civilizations to flee underground, Splatoon's backstory is dark.

Well—it gets a little darker when you realize that, with every bio-mechanical menace you dispatch during the games' boss battles, your actions are leading to the rapid devastation of Octarian civilization to the point that their screams of terror, collapsing infrastructure, and the sound of their trains fleeing increasingly powerless colonies in desperation ring out like ghostly choruses. Or, rather, that's what I'd say if I bought into the theory that a sequence of eerie noises accompanying the end of every boss battle suggests you're contributing to your enemies' genocide.

Oh, and if this one isn't creepy enough: the director of the game, Tsubasa Sakaguchi, has no idea where the sounds came from either.