The Little Mermaid is one of my favorite animated Disney movies. As a little kid, my friends and I would sometimes wander around the playground singing Disney songs, and one of the constants was "Part of Your World." In order to sing that song to completion, I had to watch The Little Mermaid a gazillion times. To this day, it is my most-watched Disney movie.

Some may not remember this, but there was a time when Disney made a string of forgettable movies. Of course, now that Disney is Disney, even their worst animated movies (comparatively speaking) are lauded as classics. (Seriously, no one watches Oliver & Company anymore.) I don't think I would be remiss in saying that it was The Little Mermaid that changed the tides of Disney's fortune. It was a sweet story, hearkening back to Disney's "princess" roots, and the music was absolutely phenomenal. The Little Mermaid was the beginning of Disney' golden age of animated films. After Ariel's adventures, we got to meet Belle, Aladdin, and Simba in quick succession. It's because of that perfect formula of song and story that we have hits today like Frozen. And to think, it all started with a little mermaid under the sea.

Of course, The Little Mermaid is not without its flaws. (Every movie ever made has its flaws. I've yet to see a perfect movie.) There are moments when the tale makes little to no sense. I love the movie, yet I recognize its mistakes. Read on if you want to find out some of Ariel and company's most ridiculous blunders.

25 Learning To Accessorize

Mermaids don't need much in the way of clothing. Their large tails prevent them from wearing any apparel on their lower halves, and the only item we see them wear on their top halves are these little clam-shaped bras. The mermen don't even have to wear that. They just go shirtless. But upon considering the mermaids' choice in clothing, I realized something kind of horrendous. The bras are clearly made of a split clam, and the sides are strapped around the mermaids' chest with a string. This is all fine and well, but when you're watching Sebastian lead a crowd of undersea life sing "Under the Sea," there are a bunch of singing clams in the mix. They lend their vocal talents in the attempt to convince Ariel to stay beneath the waves.

So clearly these clams are sentient. Does that mean that Ariel is wearing the body of a former friend around her chest? This is one of the major problems that The Little Mermaid runs into. Actually, this is one of the major problems in any kids movie that takes place in a typical fish-eat-fish ecosystem. It's hard to imagine that Ariel and the other merfolk of Atlantica could survive in the ocean without utilizing the natural resources at their disposal. But doing so would mean that they would have to be a little... vicious when it comes to finding things to eat and wear.

24 Who Left The Dog Out?

Who doesn't love a Disney movie with an animal sidekick? And what better animal sidekick could you ask for than a dog? Ariel has her own animal companions under the waves, so it makes sense that Prince Eric has his animal companion on land. Max is an adorable shaggy dog that looks like he would have a bit of a slobbering issue in real life. He clearly loves Eric, and he's the only creature on Eric's ship that notices when Ariel is spying on them. And when Ursula strolls in to Eric's life disguised as Vanessa, Max can clearly tell that she is up to no good. (All good dogs can sense the presence of evil.) Unlike Ariel's friends though, Max is deficient in one regard.

He can't talk.

Flounder and Sebastian, a fish and a crab respectively, can use words to talk to Ariel and guide her on her mission, but Eric's dog remains sadly mute. He can't give Eric the same kind of help that Ariel receives from her animal friends. Sure, he can bark and growl, but wouldn't it have been really helpful if Max could have told Eric that Ariel was the girl who had rescued him? Or what if Max was able to warn Eric about Ursula? I guess it would have been a little too helpful. The story would have been resolved to quickly and too neatly. Are only marine animals allowed to speak? Is there something about residing in saltwater that makes it easier on cartoon animals' vocal cords?

23 Hold Your Breath

Ariel's not the brightest starfish on the ocean floor, and she reveals her lack of intelligence when she makes that deal with Ursula. Even though the only knowledge she has of the human world is from sunken garbage, Ariel gets it into her head that she's going to turn herself human and meet up with this guy she met once. (She's didn't even really "meet" him if you think about it.) She even goes to Ursula, a reputedly evil sea witch, to get some assistance in turning herself into a two-legged land-dweller. Unfortunately for Ariel, she doesn't seem to get it into her head that humans don't do well underwater. There's a reason humans live on land instead of below the waves: they can't breathe underwater!

When Ursula transforms Ariel into a human, she doesn't do it within easy reach of the ocean surface. The transformation occurs while Ariel is still inside Ursula's cave on the ocean floor. Ariel struggles to take her first gasps of air while she's still surrounded by the sea. You can see the panic on her face when you see her throat constricting with a lack of oxygen. Flounder and Sebastian are then seen helping her up to the surface so she can breathe. I'm calling bull-turkey on that. No way could a tiny fish and crab help up a human girl who has never swum with two legs before to the surface of the ocean from the sea bed in time for her to not drown. It is physically impossible.

22 Nothing Wrong With A Little Odd Behavior

I would like to think that my long-time friends are able to tell when I'm not acting like myself. If, for example, I came over to their houses and told them I was going to marry someone I had just met that very evening, all the while with a stoic expression and a blank stare on my face, I hope they would know something was amiss. (It's reassuring to think that my friends would never fall for an Invasion-of-the-Body-Snatchers situation.)

Prince Eric is not so lucky in his friends.

When Eric enters his palace with Vanessa disgustingly draped over his arm, Grimsby, Eric's longtime confidant, doesn't seem to find anything wrong with the situation. In fact, Grimsby is absolutely delighted by the whole thing. (It's Grimsby's fondest dream to see Eric married, for some weird reason.) He's ecstatic that Eric is going to marry some random stranger who he knows nothing about. Not only does that tickle his fancy, Grimsby can't even be bothered to notice that his friend is acting strangely. All the times we've seen Eric before, he has appeared to be a genial, friendly, and charming young man. Then, all of a sudden, when Vanessa appears beside him, Eric has turned into Mr. Roboto. And Grimsby just can't see these changes? Hmph. Some friend.

21 Danger, Will Robinson

I firmly believe that everyone has a little voice inside them that tells them when something is a bad idea. Some people call this voice their gut feeling. Other people just call it logical reasoning. I think that when people make bad decisions, it's because they couldn't hear or they didn't listen to this voice. Ariel must make a habit of ignoring this voice because she makes a string of bad decisions in The Little Mermaid. Her biggest would have to be not turning tail and fleeing from Ursula when she saw Ursula's little garden of seaweed people.

Those gross wisps of former merpeople were horrifying, and any sane person would have taken one look at them and realized that they were heading into a terrible situation. It does not take a rocket scientist to figure out that Ursula is into some shady stuff after seeing those guys. Even if you have no idea what those things are, they look abjectly miserable. I don't care how much you might want to be human or how much you want to be with a man you've only met once, you do not make a deal with a person who has creepy front lawn decorations. Let me offer up advice to anyone who might find themselves in a similar situation. If you ever see a collection of groping weeds with sad eyes in front of someone's house, just leave. Ariel should have just noped her way back home.

20 A Bushel And A Peck

The trials and tribulations of kissing a person should not be understated. At the same time, they should not be blown out of proportion. Ariel makes a deal with Ursula that she will be human for three days, during which time she must kiss Prince Eric. If she fails to kiss Eric during that time, she will remain Ursula's prisoner forever, turned into one of those goopy creatures outside of Ursula's cave. As such, you would think that getting a quick peck would be more important to Ariel than spending time with Eric out on the town. Don't get me wrong. I'm all for the two of them getting to know each other before jumping into marriage, but time was clearly of the essence at that point.

It took Ariel way too long to get a kiss from Eric.

All she had to do was quickly move her lips right next to his and give him a swift peck. That's it. As far as I'm aware, there were no stipulations in the contract Ariel signed for Ursula about how long the kiss had to be or in what manner it had to occur. The only thing that needed to happen was lip touching. That's it. If Ariel and leaned in more rapidly during that romantic boat ride instead of hesitating and leaning in as slow as molasses, Ariel would have been human just like that, no fuss, no muss. In my opinion, she could have even kissed him when they met on the beach after she first got her legs.

19 Villainous Behaviour Was Allowed To Endure

Ursula clearly has a reputation for being evil. Sebastian gasps in horror at the mention of her name, King Triton is alarmed at the thought of her, and even Ariel showed some initial trepidation at the idea of going to her for aid. (Of course, Ariel ignored her better judgment and decided to visit Ursula anyway, but I digress.) Ursula is no one to be trifled with. She's known as the sea witch, and she has a garden of former merpeople whom she has changed into seaweed creatures, forever trapped within a sedentary life-form. Now what I really want to know is why she has been allowed to exist and operate independently for so long without anyone stopping her from continuing her evil machinations. It's weird!

Everyone seems to know she's bad, yet they do nothing to hinder her.

Shouldn't King Triton have locked her up somewhere? I'm sure all those merpeople she has caught had family out and about. Weren't they worried about their missing family members? Wasn't Ursula the prime suspect for what happened to them? These crimes could be laid right at Ursula's tentacles. I honestly think something should have been done to stop her. Is there no such thing as merpeople prison in Atlantica? There's a first time for everything, I suppose.

18 Crabby Wisdom

Max, Prince Eric's dog, may not have been able to give Eric sound words of advice, but Ariel's animal friends should have been able to talk to Eric and help move the situation along. Don't believe me? Remember the moment just before Sebastian starts singing "Kiss the Girl?" Eric is playing a guessing game with Ariel, trying to figure out her name since she's mute and can't tell it to him herself. Eric runs through a whole list of names, each more unlikely than the last, until finally, Sebastian, who has been hiding nearby the whole time, whispers into Eric's ear, "Ariel." Eric then says, "Ariel" himself, and Ariel nods excitedly in confirmation.

Hold the phone there. Are you trying to tell me that Sebastian can speak to Eric, and Eric can understand what Sebastian is saying? If that's the case, why hasn't Sebastian gone up to Eric and told him the whole story?! What are they doing on a rowboat playing guessing games?! Sebastian could have sidled up to Eric at any time and explained Ariel's predicament to him. None of the problems that ensued at the end of the movie would have happened if Sebastian had just spilled the beans to Eric. This is where problems arise when dealing with Disney movies that have talking animals. If the animals can talk and explain themselves to people, then there's no reason why they shouldn't do so when it would be really helpful.

17 Long Live The King

In most Disney movies, if our main characters are connected to royalty, they are either princes or princesses. Kings and queens are the parents in Disney movies, never the main characters (except for Elsa from Frozen). We don't always get to see the king and the queen in these scenarios, and The Little Mermaid is no exception. Even though Eric is called Prince Eric, we never get to see his parents. The only parental figure Eric seems to have is his manservant Grimsby, and judging from how poorly Grimsby dealt with Eric when he was mind-controlled by Vanessa, I would say he doesn't exactly cut the best father figure.

However, if Eric is still referred to as a prince, why aren't his parents around? If his parents are still alive, you would think they would be very invested in who Eric chooses to spend the rest of his life with. They would care deeply about the fact that Eric intends to marry a girl he met only once. Despite all this, we don't hear squat from his parents. Does this mean they're no longer with us? If that's the case, then someone should definitely elevate Eric's status from prince to king. If he's in charge of an entire kingdom, he should definitely spend more time ruling and less time taking long walks on the beach with his dog while playing his flute.

16 Conditioner Hair

I love going to the beach. I'm awfully fond of wading out into the waves and letting them just push and pull me along however they will. The deeper I go, the higher the waves will lap against my body. As soon as the ocean water is chest high, any waves that hit me will splash water all over my face and hair. (This is enjoyable for me, even though it may not sound like it.) Needless to say, as soon as I step out of the water, my hair is a tangled, stringy mess. I could not dream of running my fingers through my hair after a prolonged encounter with salt water. It would be an exercise in pain. I don't believe I'm the only person to experience this after a trip to the beach.

Ariel is the exception to the rule.

No matter where Ariel is, even if she just emerged from the ocean, her hair looks fantastic. She could be a hair model after spending days submerged in the sea. Frankly, it's amazing Eric was not immediately taken with her after he saw her on land for the first time. He should have been properly astonished at how vibrant and luscious her hair looked. I think prime hair conditioning is a super power that all Disney princesses seem to share, but none of them can top Ariel in this regard. She was able to run her fingers through her hair after a dip in the ocean. It makes no sense, but that's the way Ariel's hair works.

15 A Donner Dinner Party

It's a fish-eat-fish world in real life, but those rules don't always apply in Disney animated movies. Reality and fantasy collided harshly with each other during the dinner scene in The Little Mermaid. It was then that we saw what was on the menu in Prince Eric's palace: stuffed crab. These poor little crabs looked frightfully similar to how Sebastian looks, so it wasn't difficult to picture them once walking and talking exactly as Sebastian does. After seeing that, it was hard for me to reconcile Ariel living her life as a human person where she may have to eat former best friends.

She didn't seem to have a problem with that though.

She rescued Sebastian from Grimsby's dinner plate, but she did not seem fazed that Eric was planning to eat his own crab with no qualms about its former personality, whatever it might have been. Ariel was shockingly cavalier at the idea that this might be her future lifestyle. But that also begs the question of what merpeople usually eat when they live under the sea. Are they all vegetarians? Or do merpeople actually eat the friendly neighborhood fish that lives beside them? I can only assume that this isn't the first time Ariel has eaten stuffed crab then. (If she's a mermaid and Sebastian is a crab, then her eating him would not be a form of cannibalism, I suppose.)

14 Where The Sun Don't Shine

I might be mistaken, so feel free to correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't believe a movie has ever been made in total darkness. It would be a lame movie indeed if all we saw was blackness on the screen. In horror movies, even if the action is taking place at night, it still seems as if we can see clear as day. Movie-people do this on purpose because no audience wants to be blind while something exciting is happening. However, it's unrealistic to think that this is how light operates. Reality takes a leave of absence in The Little Mermaid in regards to lighting.

A lot of the underwater scenes in the movie take place really close to the sea floor. Sunlight does not reach that far down in real life. If you were to be dropped into the middle of the ocean with a pair of goggles and you strapped them on, one look below the surface would confirm that it's nothing but blackness down there. Don't get me wrong, the sun does provide some illumination. However, it does not provide the high amount of light that is shown in The Little Mermaid. In reality, Ariel and the other merfolk would live in darkness for the most part. If that was the case, then their eyes would have to look weirdly formed in order to compensate for the lack of light. But of course, Ariel has to keep her sweet baby blues.

13 Fish Are Friends, Not Food

The shark that appears in The Little Mermaid raises the same questions as previous entries on this list have. Many of Ariel's friends can speak to each other and to Ariel, but this shark is an exception. Either he can speak and he won't or he is simply unable to converse intelligibly with his prey. Like Eric's dog, Max, this shark does not say a word during the whole movie. This produces a fountain of questions. Why are sharks the odd ones out in the talking-sea-animal food chain? Is it just this particular shark that is a mute? Maybe this shark finds it discomforting to start a conversation with a creature he's about to gobble up, and that's why he remains mum. (I don't blame him if that's the case. Who wants to hear the life story of something you're about to consume in a single bite?)

The shark being unable to speak makes less sense when you consider that smaller fish like Flounder have no problems uttering words. The shark is larger and more intelligent than your average fish (you would think). If an animated movie is going to have talking fish, the shark should be the most eloquent of all, second to dolphins. Now that I think about it, the dolphins that King Triton rides in on to Ariel's coming-of-age performance also don't speak. What is going on in this backward world?!

12 Pausing For A Musical Number

You know what's the first thing I do when I rescue a person who has just survived a shipwreck and nearly drowning? I sing to them. Honesty time. I've never rescued a person from a shipwreck. But if I had, I would not just stare at them singing to them. One, that's probably not the most helpful thing to do. Two, the person might wake up and hear me. Now, normally, in Disney movies, and musicals in general, ignoring the fact that people break into song randomly is an unspoken thing. We are all supposed to assume that they are not "actually" singing.

Ariel breaks the mold when she sings.

Eric wakes up and he "actually" hears Ariel singing. That's how Ursula ends up fooling him later on. She pulls out that shell necklace that has Ariel's singing voice trapped inside and plays it so that Eric thinks she is the mysterious girl who rescued him. Does this mean that every time someone sings in The Little Mermaid, they are "actually" singing? That would mean that Ursula "actually" sings her evil proposal to Ariel when she tries to convince her to sign the contract. That would mean that Sebastian "actually" serenades Eric and Ariel when they're in the rowboat. And that would undermine the very foundation of Disney musicals! And that, boys and girls, is why you don't sing songs to half-drowned men.

11 In Sickness And In Health

We learn early on that Ursula does not have a true interest in capturing Ariel. What Ursula really cares about is entrapping King Triton. She knows that if Ariel's life is in danger, King Triton will come running to save her (err, swimming to save her, I mean). So the whole scheme of getting Ariel to sign that contract and then foiling Ariel's attempts to kiss Prince Eric, which would then fulfill Ariel's side of the contract, are all meant to be steps on a ladder that will take Ursula to beating King Triton. Clearly, Triton once did something to Ursula that enraged her beyond reason.

But one thing makes no sense in this otherwise faultless scheme.

Why does Ursula agree to marry Eric? She clearly chose the guise of Vanessa to lure Eric away from kissing Ariel. Ariel had been coming too close to getting that kiss, so something had needed to be done. But she could have kept Eric away from Ariel without having to marry him. What was the plan for after saying her vows? If Ariel and her animal friends hadn't prevented the marriage, Ursula, as Vanessa, would have been a princess of a principality. What then? How does being a princess of the land factor into any of Ursula's original plans? Would she have just abandoned Prince Eric as soon as the honeymoon was over? Would she have remained as Eric's wife, gaining immense power over land and sea? Alas, the world will never know.

10 It's Only Words

Ariel made a not-so-smart decision when she chose to sign the contract that Ursula presented her. She signed away her freedom for the small chance that she could go on land and get the man of her dreams to kiss her. Plus, that contract was all shiny and golden, a clear indication that some sinister magic was involved when Ariel signed her name to it. Ariel just continues to display her not-smartness when she gets on land and has to win over her man. As part of the deal with Ursula, Ariel gave away her voice as well, so she couldn't even talk to Prince Eric and tell him what she needed from him. She was reduced to small gestures and expressions.

However, if she had used her brain, Ariel would have known that she could use a pen and a paper to write out messages to Eric. She clearly knows how to write (for some strange and unexplained reason), so it is not implausible that she could have written out whole passages to Eric. So why didn't she? Think of the time that could have been saved, the heartbreak that could have been prevented, if Ariel had just scrawled the words, "Hey, I'm the girl who rescued you, and I need you to kiss me." Everything could have been solved immediately. A lot of the things that don't make sense with this movie are things that could have shortened the movie's running time.

9 Once Upon A Dream

The Little Mermaid also falls prey to the recurring nonsensical Disney stereotype that has ever been made. The story is all about a girl who falls in love with a man in a single day and then goes out of her way to be with him for the rest of her life. Ariel is not the only princess in a long line of princesses to fall in love with a man on such short notice. She observes Prince Eric first while he's on his ship. He's dancing with the other sailors, playing his flute, and hanging out with his dog, Max. She also later sees Eric save Max at the risk of his own life. (Love of a dog is perhaps the most admirable quality I could hope to find in a person.) Eric does not show himself to be a man of ill-repute in any way.

But a couple of minutes of observation is not enough to get to know a person. There may be flaws within Eric's character that Ariel is not aware of, and yet she's willing to spend the rest of her life with him. On Eric's side, he only got the merest of glimpses of Ariel when she rescued him and pulled him onto the beach. Well, he also heard her sing, but that's about all he knows of her. Love at first sight is one of the worst tropes that fantasies perpetuate. It sends the wrong message to impressionable, young kids, and it also makes absolutely no sense. (I just know someone is going to tell me that love doesn't have to make sense. I just know it.)

8 Curtain Call

Our first idea of what Ariel is like as a person is given to us without her being around. A large performance had been readied to present Ariel's musical ability to the rest of Atlantica. It's a performance that focuses on Ariel. Despite this, Ariel is a no-show to her own show. We can only assume that she was supposed to be within this little clam stage, sitting on a pillow, and when the stage was raised, she was supposed to belt out singing. Instead, we only get an empty clam, and we find out that Ariel ditched the performance to go exploring old shipwrecks that have sunk to the bottom of the ocean floor. Basically, our first impression of Ariel is that she is a good-for-nothing, unreliable sister.

I do wonder how no one noticed she wasn't around. I've participated in only a few theatrical performances in my lifetime, but I do know that if someone is missing at the beginning of the performance, everyone knows it. If the person who is in charge of the lighting is missing, everyone knows, let alone the main star. How did none of Ariel's sisters notice she was not where she was supposed to be? How did Sebastian, the composer of the piece Ariel was supposed to sing, not know she had not shown up yet? Instead of having the performance interrupted right before Ariel would have sung, the whole thing should have been cancelled right from the very start.

7 Papers, Please

I did not realize how little sense these moments made until after I had seen The Little Mermaid numerous times. When you're a kid, you just assume that there is a consistency to the way things work in cartoons and in real life. That's why when we're kids, we try to blow bubbles in the same manner as SpongeBob SquarePants, never imagining those fantastical shapes SpongeBob's bubbles take are pure nonsense. The Little Mermaid made me believe that paper could survive underwater.

There are at least three examples that I can list off the top of my head where parchment existed below the sea waves when it should have disintegrated into a million pieces. Sebastian pulls out sheet music at the beginning of the performance that Ariel was supposed to give. It makes wrinkling sounds just like dry paper would, but it's underwater. Then there's the portrait that Ariel touches when she's singing about how fire burns people. If that portrait was aboard a ship that sunk ages ago, no way should that painting be as defined as it is in the movie. There is also, let's not forget, Ursula's contract that she pulls up for Ariel to sign. Then again, that's a magic contract, so perhaps it escapes the usual rules that govern placing paper in wet environments.

6 Quick To Say I Do

Gratitude is one of my default emotions. I wake up feeling grateful to be alive, I watch movies grateful that there are people in the world creative enough to make them, and I write lists grateful that there are people interested enough to read them. Despite my own grateful nature, there is such a thing as taking gratitude too far. Prince Eric takes his gratitude for Ariel saving his life to new extremes. Apparently, after getting rescued and then abandoned on a beach, Eric becomes infatuated with the idea of marrying the girl who saved him. He even tells Grimsby, his stodgy companion, that the only girl in the world who is meant for him is the girl who rescued him.

Yikes. Ariel ends up being a sweet, sweet girl, but what if she had been a nightmare of a person who just so happened to save Eric's life one day? There is absolutely nothing wrong with being thankful to a person who got you out of a dire situation. But you should not then promise to spend the rest of your life with that person without first knowing what they are like. Eric is lucky that Ariel saved his life and not a horrible demon. Imagine if Voldemort had been Eric's rescuer. Now imagine that Eric says all those things about how he is meant to be with the person who pulled him out of the water even though he has no clue who that person is. You see what I'm saying here, right?