They say that imitation is the highest form of flattery, but, when it comes to these cheap Disney toy knockoffs, that certainly isn’t the case. In fact, the Mouse House is more inclined to file a lawsuit than show some admiration for these products. While a few make at least a minimal effort to avoid treading on the company’s copyright-protected feet, some are so blatantly obvious that it’s almost baffling.
Sure, Disney’s lawyers probably don’t have enough time to go after the thousands upon thousands of fraudulent products released every year, but some of these things are so totally offensive that they drag down the name by simple association. Seriously, nobody can look at Darth Vader the same once they get a load of Darth Macho, and it’s hard to find that same innocent love for Winnie the Pooh after staring into the bleak, soulless eyes of Bear of the Interest—yes, that’s actually what it’s called.
Most of these are just so bad they’re funny, and it’s super apparent that whoever cobbled these monstrosities together only held the most tenuous understanding of the source material they were ripping off. At the end of the day, it hardly matters; slap something together that could vaguely be compared to any of Disney’s beloved characters and it will probably sell. It’s not the most honest way to make a profit, but… well, on second thought, there really aren’t any redeeming qualities here. Children, avert your eyes, here are 30 hilarious knock-off Disney toys that we can never forget.
30 Magic World Snow
Right off the bat, this is about as shameless as it gets. The dolls don’t really resemble Elsa and Anna from Frozen all that well, but they literally used images of those sisters on the box. Anyone who hasn’t seen the movie could easily mistake this for the real thing so long as they don’t pay too much attention to the shoddy workmanship, and Disney definitely wouldn’t let whoever is behind this get away unlitigated were they aware of it. Honestly, they did a pretty decent job of replicating the clothes of the characters, but why does Elsa’s hair look like it’s attached to the top of Anna’s head? And why do the dolls look so overwhelmingly generic?
29 Mighty Muscle Goofe
Everyone knows that Goofy isn’t exactly famous for his intellect, but most aren’t aware that what he lacks in smarts he makes up for in biceps. He may look overly-slender in most of his cartoon depictions, but he actually wrestles in his free time and was the heavyweight champion of Toontown at one point. Alright, none of that is actually true, but it probably is in the world of ‘Goofe.’ What exactly would make someone think that this was a good idea? They would have to have absolutely no idea who or what the Disney character Goofy is, but that logo and the background images seems to suggest that they’ve done at least a little bit of research.
28 Toy Special 3
Hype surrounding the Toy Story series of films has reached an all-time high thanks to the recent, rather unexpected announcement of an upcoming fourth installment. While the adventures of Woody, Buzz and the gang felt pretty complete once the third movie wrapped up, Pixar is somehow going to deliver yet another narrative. Hopefully it isn’t as awful as Toy Special 3. This figure looks like an alternate version of Buzz Lightyear if he actually got run over by that truck in the first movie, and anyone with a casual familiarity of the series would instantly be able to tell that this is a cheap bootleg.
27 Bear Of The Interest
Bear of the Interest is the ultimate reminder that universal entropy is unstoppable and all that we hold dear will eventually be destroyed. It would vaguely resemble Winnie the Pooh had the character been drawn by a five year old child with only an imprecise description to work with, and, when his eyes light up, we suddenly know what it’s like to be a deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming vehicle. There’s a video floating around somewhere which shows this thing in action, and it spins and emits some high-pitched electronic noise which makes it more suitable as some sort of weapon than a toy.
26 Super Hero Avengers New Arrival
Some Marvel fans were a little puzzled when the original Avengers movie debuted in 2012 and Spider-Man was absent from the hero lineup. Though he would eventually find his way into the franchise, we’ve all been waiting for everyone’s favorite superhero, Buzz Lightyear, to make his first appearance. As everyone knows, Buzz was both the first and most powerful member of the Avengers, and we can only assume that this toy release is a hint at his inclusion at the upcoming Endgame film. He may look a little stiff, and, well, unofficial, but this is definitely a nod at a wider crossover of Disney films being in the works. Yup, definitely.
25 Sense Of Right Alliance
The Avengers may have Buzz Lightyear, but DC comics has a new super hero squad of its own. Well, this might be DC comics… it’s hard to tell. We’ve clearly got Batman and Superman taking center stage, but it looks like Marvel’s Spider-Man has come over from the Marvel Comics universe in the world’s first officially-sanctioned crossover toy deal. There also seems to be a Power Ranger to the left of these guy standing alongside one of Disney’s cars, and, quite honestly, the inclusion of these characters may diminish the believability of this product slightly. We’ve also got Shrek on the far right, which doesn’t make much sense coinciding with a Disney property.
24 Star Knight
Darth Vader is the ruthless enforcer of the Empire, and his very visage is meant to strike terror in the hearts of those living under imperial rule. Unfortunately, he seems to have had some trouble getting around in recent years, so Darth Sidious equipped him with a cool police vespa so he could more efficiently command the galaxy. The man himself may have already been intimidating, but this sight of him riding this thing would make any criminal think twice. On a serious note, this is a pretty hilarious example of how little those making these bootleg toys often know about the source material of the stuff their ripping off.
23 Astronocchio
Disney’s Pinocchio animated feature is a beloved classic these days, but few remember the sequel which saw the sentient puppet turn lime green after ingesting some toxic waste and fighting crime with a laser pistol. Full disclosure; while this could certainly pass for some horrible knock-off Disney material, this is actually a piece of art created by artist Dave Bondi. He’s really nailed the inauthentic look of these rip-offs, and it wouldn’t be hard to imagine this thing languishing on the shelves of some less-than-reputable retailer. A twisted combination of Pinocchio and Astroboy, it’s all fun and games until somebody steals this idea and actually tries to sell it as a genuine product.
22 Inside Out
2015’s Inside Out was another awesome Pixar release which anthropomorphised our core thoughts and feelings, and, for some, it changed the way we conceptualized abstract behavior. While emotions were made out to be cutesy little cerebral beings, you’ve probably got some problems if there’s a buff version of Spongebob Squarepants running around inside your noggin. This looks like somebody tore apart an Inside Out toy set and replaced half of the figures with memorabilia from that weird half live action Spongebob movie that came out a few years ago. Strangely, the packaging seems to be fairly authentic, and some really out-of-the-loop consumers might mistakenly buy this for their grandchildren based on that alone.
21 Snow Showers
Frozen seems to be a really popular intellectual property to fake, and, given that a sequel was recently announced, that trend is destined to increase dramatically. These “Snow Showers” dolls seem to be a laughably poor attempt at creating something distinct enough from Disney’s characters as to not get sued into oblivion. They look like creepy off-brand Cabbage Patch kids that were re-purposed at the last minute, and Anna’s half-closed eye is really unsettling. In fact, she is sort of reminiscent of that awful spider doll head found in the original Toy Story movie. Presentation is everything when it comes to toys like this, and they’re doing a terrible job.
20 Star Wars Meets Toy Story
When Disney acquired the Star Wars license a few years ago, fans were hoping that they would treat the property with the respect that George Lucas gradually lost, but none could have imaged that it would come to this. Actually, given the presence of Darth Maul in this weird set, this probably came out when the prequels were big. They actually showcase a surprising amount of foresight, having predicted Mauls’ bisection and subsequent revival with a set of robot legs. C3PO looks like a Gundam, and it’s horrible, and, for whatever reason, Buzz Lightyear, the definite odd-one-out in this selection, seems to be the one wielding the dual-bladed lightsaber.
19 My First Disnay Princess
Most of these faux Disney brands bear conspicuously similar names to the product which they’re attempting to replicate; tons of dolls adorn the title of “Desney” or “Denese,” but few venture so hilariously into legal gray areas as “My First Disnay Princess,” or perhaps “D1snay Princess.” They didn’t even bother to change the font at all, and it’s ridiculously obvious that they’re only hoping to sell dolls on a false premise. We can’t see much of the doll in this image, but the hair already looks to be fairly ratty. Plus, they clearly didn’t stop with The Little Mermaid, as a caricature of Disney’s Brave can be seen on the right. All in all, this is a fairly well constructed knock-off, but that name is just cringe-inducing.
18 Ceramic Scam
Ceramic figures can make for neat collectibles or hobby items if done well, but these certainly weren’t. It’s hard to know the intended audience of these things given how totally off they look. Buzz Lightyear looks like he leap off of the pages of a child’s drawing; his color is off, his stance is weird, and his eyes look like they’re beginning to melt out of their sockets. What’s more, while the Dora the Explorer figurine to his left looks at least passable, that John Cena wannabe to his right is downright offensive. This would be a funny gag gift for a Disney fan, but this definitely isn’t the sort of thing anyone in their right mind would want to purchase and display on their shelf.
17 Wise Puppet And Door Ladder
Everyone knows about Star Wars at this point, but we should really shift our attention to the up-and-coming epic sci-fi franchise Star Warsior featuring Wise Puppet and Door Ladder as directed by Jorge Loukas. His name is Door Ladder. Door. Ladder. That’s what someone would come up with if they only heard Darth Vader’s name once and the person saying it was speaking too fast, so they just kind of had to guess. He looks more like a Tusken Raider than the Dark Lord of the Sith, and it’s embarrassing. What’s worse, of course, is Wise Puppet, the Yoda knock off who looks like he gets to other planets by taking illegal substances rather than traveling in a ship.
16 Incredible
The Bootleg Stuff Twitter account has some pretty priceless posts, and this is definitely one of them. The Incredibles have been popular for some time, but the characters’ visibility was recently boosted thanks to the long-awaited sequel to the 2004 movie. Mr. Incredible looks like an aspiring Stretch Armstrong here, though he might actually may be made out of some kind of ceramic. Elastigirl looks alright provided the artist was intent on capturing her mid-transformation. Dash and Violet are both unspeakable, but the worst offender her is Jack Jack. He looks like he was drawn by the same guy who did the Dilbert comics, and it’s genuinely upsetting.
15 Fpozen Diensy Prnciess
You really have to not know what you’re doing to wind up spelling the word ‘frozen’ with a p. This reads like the words “Frozen Disney Princess” were tossed into a woodchipper and hastily reassembled. What’s more, while a clearly stolen PNG of Elsa and Anna adorns the top of the package, the toy showcased on the front doesn’t even look like it has anything to do with the movie at all. It might be one of the male characters, but none of them looked like that. What’s more, this doubles as both a Disney and Lego knock-off, and it really should just be thrown into the garbage so nobody else has to look at it. In reality, this thing probably didn’t have anything to do with the movie, and the creators just wanted to cash in on the name.
14 Deformation Cars Eggs
Toys like Hot Wheels or Matchbox are inherently collectible and easily appeal to children. That said, most are fans of these little cars because they’re miniaturized versions of the real thing. This weird, deformed version of Lightning McQueen, however, is just off-putting. Why is it an egg? Why couldn’t they just make a little Cars-themed Hot Wheels rip off? No, instead, they wanted to appeal to the broadest possible audience by contorting this thing into both a car, a piece of collect-em-all memorabilia, and a Kinder Egg. Judging by that diagram, it looks like he actually unfolds into a proper car, which is kind of cool, though they definitely didn’t get that idea by watching Disney’s movie.
13 Mc Astral Land
‘Mc Astral’ sounds like something you would get if you put the name ‘Lightning McQueen’ into Google Translate, translated it to Korean, then Russian, then Portuguese, and then back into English. The worst part about this is that whoever put this awful product out clearly had no idea what the original property was. In a sad attempt to make this thing legally viable, they airbrushed out McQueen’s eyes and re-named him. This worst part about this is the apparent implication that his headlights are now his eyes, which gets creepier the more you think about it. The original Lightning McQueen was voiced by Owen Wilson, but Mc Astral is probably voiced by Danny DeVito, and his catchphrase is “kerchooga" instead of "kachow."
12 Naruto
N… Naruto? That’s… well, that’s just not Naruto, now is it? This feels like that oft-memed backpack which has Sonic the Hedgehog’s head on it but says ‘Obama’ in rainbow lettering underneath. The person who put this thing together obviously had no idea what either Naruto or The Incredibles was but mashed them together anyway in the hopes that it would sell. Of course, most Westerners would snap this up in a heartbeat just because it would be such a great gag gift for a Disney fan. It at least makes a vague sort of sense; both Dash and Naruto are fast—is that the connection we’re supposed to be making here?
11 Snow White Is Melting
Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs was the first feature-length film to be produced by Disney and was released all the way back in 1937. It has since become a time-honored classic, and the movie’s popularity has spawned a nearly uncountable number of knock-offs. This lollipop looks like it jumped right out of one of those horrible YouTube videos which are meant to appeal to kids but are just creepy. It looks like she’s been run over by a rolling pin one too many times, and this product probably contains several times more than the recommended amount of asbestos.