Star Wars. Honestly, those words should be more than enough for an introduction. Whether the franchise is your thing or not, we doubt there is a single person alive who has never heard of George Lucas' massively popular series. From the thrilling lightsaber battles to the creative worlds, Star Wars captured the attention and imagination of children and adults alike. Star Wars: Episode IV - A New Hope launched in theatres back in 1977, introducing the world to Darth Vader, Luke Skywalker, Princess Leia, and Han Solo. Nowadays, these names are synonymous with science-fiction and cinema, with many filmmakers paying homage to the franchise.
The original trilogy will never be forgotten and the same can be said for the newer entries. Sure, some might prefer to wipe The Last Jedi or the prequels from their mind, but they are not going anywhere.
Most of us watched these movies during our childhood, but Star Wars does have its fair share of risky moments. Taking into account the extended universe, children were not always the franchise's target audience. Whether in the books, comics, or movies; occasionally, things got pretty dark or weird. Actually, the latter tends to be more of the case. After reading through this list, Jar Jar Binks might seem like a perfectly normal addition to the lore.
Time to ruin our collective childhoods! Here are 25 facts about Star Wars way too inappropriate for kids.
25 Like Father, Like Son
For those who managed to sit through the prequels, you should know that Darth Vader started out as a Jedi before slowly succumbing to the dark side. Thankfully, his son proved resistant to temptation and never strayed from the light. Actually, if taking into account the expanded universe, that is technically not correct. Set six years after the battle for Endor, Tom Veitch and Cam Kennedy's Dark Empire comic series centers around a returning Emperor Palpatine and his quest to attract Luke Skywalker to the dark side.
For a while, he totally pulls it off.
Luke gets yellow eyes and everything. At first, Skywalker is so impressed by Palpatine's knowledge of the Force that he willingly becomes his apprentice, although that proves to be somewhat of a ruse. Later on, Palpatine temporarily brainwashes Luke into joining the dark side.
24 The Shape Of Callista
Remember how the introduction mentioned that Star Wars can get pretty weird? Well, here is exhibit A. Barbara Hambly's Children of the Jedi was published in 1995 by Bantam Spectra and takes place after the events of The Jedi Academy Trilogy. Luke Skywalker travels with a few of his students to the Eye of Palpatine, an automated Dreadnaught that nearly destroyed a Jedi base. The plan was stopped by a Jedi named Callista, who transferred her life force into the Eye's systems. As love knows no bounds, Luke quickly grew attached to Callista. In other words, Luke fell in love with a computer. Luckily, one of Skywalker's students does not survive the mission, providing a body for Callista to use. The Jedi take their recycling very seriously.
23 Jabba's Palace Was Hardly Fun And Games
Return of the Jedi solidified its place in pop-culture history within the first half-an-hour. The rescue sequence set in Jabba the Hutt's palace is far from the greatest plan ever hitched; seriously, they should have just started off with their super-powerful Jedi, but something good came out of the experience.
Leia's golden outfit is legendary.
Putting aside the visual stimulus, Jabba's palace was a rather grim place that forced dancers like Oola and, temporarily, Leia into a precarious position. While the princess got out relatively unharmed, Oola decided to end her own life rather than go back to Jabba's side. Either way, Jabba's palace sounds like an awful place to spend an evening. Return of the Jedi's opening half-an-hour continues to be remembered fondly for obvious reasons.
22 Xenomorphs Have Nothing On Brain Invaders
Star Wars: The Clone Wars is the best product related to the franchise released over the last twenty years. Packed to the brim with fantastic action sequences and complex characters, this cartoon hits all the right notes. Broadcasted on Disney XD and Cartoon Network, The Clone Wars was obviously written with a younger audience in mind. While most of the content is perfect entertainment for the entire family, there are a handful of episodes which take things in a horrifying direction. Brain Invaders is one of those moments. Most people can agree that Xenomorphs are rather terrifying. Now, imagine they were capable of climbing up someone's nose and controlling their bodies. Furthermore, imagine those puppets consist of powerful troopers who pack quite a bunch and you have yourself a Geonosian brain worm.
21 Palpatine Seems Awfully Familiar
Hey, does anyone else think that Emperor Palpatine and the Empire hold a striking resemblance to an infamous real-world regime that rose to power in the 1930s? Surely, it cannot just be us and George Lucas who feel that way.The interesting bit is that Palpatine's closest inspiration is not actually Hitler or Napoleon Bonaparte.
The Emperor is based on someone closer to home.
The Making of Star Wars: Return of the Jedi includes a conference were Lucas explains that the biggest and worst Star Wars villain was a stand-in for Richard M. Nixon. Considering the original movie came out only two years after the fall of Saigon, this decision makes quite a lot of sense. Who knew that a franchise about space wizards was grounded in reality?
20 The Droid That Enjoyed Hurting Droids
EV-9D9's story is one of sadness and intrigue. As a MerenData EV supervisor droid, this mechanical construct was designed to be peaceful and hardworking. 9D9 was more than happy to mind its own business while carrying out his duty as a moisture vaporator mechanic. It was born specifically for this reason.
Sadly, faith had other plans.
9D9 experienced a fault in its programming, turning this once kind and generous droid into a monster. Instead of finding joy in its daily routine, the robot started to love taking apart other droids. Jabba quickly took an interested in this one-of-a-kind creation and added 9D9 to his crew. From that point on, the droid purpose was simply to painfully interrogate its own kind. Just to be clear, droids feel pain and pleasure. In this rare instance, those two emotions were intertwined.
19 Luke Joins The Cult Side
Jedi Skywalker has it rough. As the most powerful wizard in most of the universe, Luke is always expected to carry the heaviest load and lead the good guys to victory. He is infallible because that is the type of hero needed by the Republic. Expectations quickly turn into pressure, and Luke might find himself struggling to accept his faith. Occasionally, people experience burnout from their jobs; so, why is it impossible for the same thing to happen to Luke? The Crystal Star novel sees Luke temporarily losing his Jedi powers due to the destruction of a nearby star. Distraught over his sudden uselessness, Master Skywalker decides to join a secret cult that worships a being from another dimension. Thankfully, Han is around to snap Luke back to his senses.
18 A Will To Survive (And Spider Legs)
Anyone remember Darth Maul? Alongside Ewan McGregor's Obi-Wan Kenobi, this Sith Lord was one of the only aspects of Star Wars: Episode I – The Phantom Menace deemed universally decent. Unfortunately, Maul's film career came to an end when he fell down a reactor shaft. So, is that it for the great Darth Maul? Fueled by revenge, the Sith survived being cut in half holding on to an air vent and reaching a trash container destined for the junkyard world of Lotho Minor.
Long story short, Maul becomes a half-spider.
Yes, that is as frightening as it sounds. One one hand, Darth Maul serves as an uplifting story about a down on his luck dude who overcomes incredible odds; on the other hand, he is an evil and insane wizard who walks around on spider legs.
17 After Credits Scare
The Phantom Menace might have genuinely been the most highly anticipated film of all time. As Disney turned Star Wars into a yearly thing, nowadays, fans are never left waiting too long to sink their teeth into something new. The Force Awakens and The Last Jedi have their positives and negatives; but, at the very least, the wait for the next entry is pretty short. The Phantom Menace was the first Star Wars feature in 17-years, so, the hype was unreal. The thought of seeing how Darth Vader became so cool was incredibly enticing. Episode I ended up delivering a ton of exposition and wooden acting, with the best moment arguably left until after the credits. With the story done, those who stuck by until the end were greeted with a sudden and terrifyingly familiar sound of Vader breathing.
16 The Empire's Got Nothing On The Yuuzhan Vong
The majority of us can probably agree that the Empire was pretty bad. Safe to say, that is hardly a controversial opinion. While Palpatine and Darth Vader rank among the worst of the worst, a single race did exist that puts them to shame. The Yuuzhan Vong were one of the only group of aliens to originate from outside the galaxy, and they showed a considerable amount of resistance to the Force. In due time, the Jedi did manage to use their abilities against the Yuuzhan, but the damage was already done.
Known as the Chosen Race, they invaded the galaxy.
Detesting technology, the Yuuzhan managed to reduce the galaxy's population by around 365 trillion sentient beings. Yes, trillion with a T. These aliens adore pain and would do anything to experience or dish it out.
15 The Kiss Seen Around The Universe
Putting aside The Empire Strikes Back's graphic moments and epic reveals, Luke and Leia's kiss is arguably the most infamous scene in the original trilogy. As later revealed in Return of the Jedi, they were actually siblings, making their initial encounter rather uncomfortable. On the other hand, Han could not be happier. Looking back, this interaction was probably not written to be so incredibly controversial. If anything, the fact that Luke and Leia were not meant to be siblings only serves to worsen the situation. The characters and actors had no clue what was happening; so, imagine their shock when the two Skywalkers learned about their heritage. Hey, it could happen to anyone.
14 Hibernation Sickness
Han Solo really got the short-end of the stick in The Empire Strikes Back. The smuggler rose up from a relatively unknown goon to one of the Alliance's main representatives. As an icon of the movement, Solo was quickly targetted by the Empire, who captured the rebel and decided to put him on ice. Carbon-freezing is the process where people are placed in hibernation, although the act is nowhere near as pleasant as it sounds. Prior to the invention of hyperdrive, this method was employed for long voyages, but the consequences were dire.
Han Solo got off easy.
In the worst case scenario, hibernation sickness could prove fatal. Other symptoms include weakness, exhaustion, dizziness, loss of memory, and temporary blindness. Considering adventures used to be willing to undergo this process for the name of exploration, we should really praise them for their courage and commitment.
13 Well, That Escalated Quickly
With all the terrible moments spread throughout the Star Wars prequels, it is easy to forget there are a handful of potentially great ideas. Operation: Knightfall takes place during Star Wars: Episode III – Revenge of the Sith and served as Anakin's point of no return. After pledging his allegiance to Palpatine and the dark side of the Force, Darth Vader leads a bunch of clones and storms the Jedi Temple on Coruscant. Nobody is allowed to leave with their lives, including the young children undergoing training at the temple. This operation is a pivotal moment in Star Wars' history and the Jedi Order's darkest hour. As Revenge of the Sith was meant to be family-friendly, practically none of this mission is depicted within the movie. We see Anakin and the troopers climbing some stairs but very little of the actual attack is shown on screen. This decision made the moment underwhelming for adults and inappropriate for children.
12 The Cave Of Bad Trips
The Dark Side Cave was introduced during The Empire Strikes Back. Located within Dagobah's swamps, Luke quickly learned that the Force is easily manipulated within this specific area. Any Jedi who ventures forth into the cave faces the risk of succumbing to the dark side of the Force, as their realities are shifted and turned upside down.
Luke finds and fights (fake) Darth Vader.
The battle is intense and entertaining, with Luke getting the win after shortening the Sith Lord by a couple of inches. Sadly for our heroic Skywalker, the victory rings hollow. Vader's helmet holds Luke's head, a revelation that scares the protagonist. At the time, Luke believes it is a sign of what could happen if he joins the dark side. From a filmmaking perspective, Lucas was obviously foreshadowing the later reveal.
11 Breaking Through The Barriers That Separate Us (As Species)
Over the years, Star Wars has introduced a ton of unique and visually interesting aliens. As art tends to imitate reality, eventually, some dude is going to go where no man has gone before. In this case, the brave explorer was Corran Horn, with America being replaced by a Selonian's private quarters. Like the greatest of legends, their encounter was not witnessed first hand; instead, the tale was told during the novel X-Wing: Wedge's Gamble. Unfortunately, humans and fur-covered carnivores seem to be far from compatible, with both parties breaking out in hives and rashes. With physical contact proving painful rather than enjoyable, Corran and Chertyl decide to just be friends. When it comes to doomed romances, Romeo & Juliet has nothing on Star Wars.
10 There Is No Greater Danger Than Banking
While reading or watching Star Wars, we doubt there exists a single person who would pick banking over galactic battles. The Phantom Menace got a bit of criticism for centering the conflict around trade agreements, but dull plot points were hardly a new thing for the franchise. 1981's comic The Third Law tells the timeless tale of how Darth Vader attempted to stop the Republic from getting a loan.
Darth Vader's evil knows no limits.
What ensues is a not-so-epic battle of wits between the Anakin and Princess Leia, as they both try to pull a fast one. As a finance minister is needed to get a loan, the Republic prepares a droid for the part, and successfully get their money. On the flip side, Vader pretends to be bested by Leia in order to receive her Crown Jewels of Alderaan, which were provided as collateral. Children will not be awake for this one.
9 Wearing Another's Skin
The Revenant and The Empire Strikes Back share practically nothing in common. One is a gripping tale of politics, personal growth, and ranks among the greatest movies of all time; the other has Leonardo DiCaprio fighting a bear. Suffice to say, they are both memorable for their own reasons. Surprisingly, they do share a single similarity, as both films include a scene were the protagonist sleeps inside the belly of an animal. The Empire Strikes Back launches with a fantastic sequence set on the icy planet of Hoth, leading to Han and Luke taking shelter inside a Tauntaun to survive the harsh weather. This scene quickly established that The Empire Strikes Back was taking the story to much darker places than A New Hope. Also, weirdly enough, fans can buy a Tauntaun sleeping bag.
8 Vader's Special Video Call
Darth Vader is one impressive Sith Lord. If there is single point the original Star Wars trilogy successfully gets across, that would be it. Rogue One's greatest moments generally consisted of Anakin showing up to teach every other character how to be cool and memorable. Whatever you do, try not to anger this former Jedi.
Admiral Ozzel ignored our warning.
Vader's signature move consists of choking an incompetent politician with the Force. Until this point, Anakin only applied this maneuver when in the same room with his target. After messing up an ambush on the Alliance, Ozzel believed he was safe before Vader did his move via a conference call. This dude would be terrifying in the digital age. Still, it would probably discourage trolls from leaving comments.
7 History Repeats Itself
George Lucas is clearly somewhat of a history buff. Star Wars is littered with parallels and references to World War II, Vietnam, and the Cold War; but, Tony Keen believes the lessons go back further than might be readily apparent. Explained further in his book Star Wars and History, Keen lists off a few similarities between Lucas' series and Ancient Rome. In particular, the Empire practically follows the same trajectory as the Roman Empire, including the fall of the Old Republic and the establishment of a dictatorship. These details are likely to go over the heads of most children, although we picked up on similarities in an instant. Seriously, Spartacus and A New Hope are practically one in the same.
6 The Tragedy Of Darth Plagueis The Wise
Why did this story turn into a meme? There is nothing particularly funny about it, and the scene sits among the best of the prequels. Darth Plagueis was Palpatine's master and teacher. Together, they sought immortality, with the master being powerful enough to create life by manipulating midi-chlorians. Plagueis intelligence and abilities granted him the moniker of 'the Wise,' but this proved to be a slippery slope. Despite controlling life, Plagueis quickly lost any semblance of humanity. Power brings forth many dangers, and the Dark Lord of Sith lived only to preserve his own strength. As the Rule of Two dictated only two Sith Lords could exist at the same time, Plagueis fell to his apprentice. Power corrupts and so on.