Fortnite's latest update granted players the ability to pet the game's animals, but the function leaves a lot to be desired.
Everybody and anybody is talking about Avengers: Endgame right now, and rightly so. Don't worry, you'll find no spoilers here. We haven't even seen the movie ourselves yet. We have been far too busy making the most of Fortnite's Endgame crossover. The LTM pits Thanos's army against players wielding Avengers' weapons and honestly, it is everything we could have ever wanted.
Time to stop praising Epic for its terrific work this week and ridicule it for the shoddy Fortnite addition it gave us last week. The ability to pet the game's animals. On paper, it sounds like exactly what we want. Any game that lets us make a fuss of a dog is tops in our books. However, make that promise and deliver what Fortnite has and you're going to be on the wrong end of a sharp tongue lashing courtesy of our keyboards.
New: Following an update, you can now pet the dog in Fortnite pic.twitter.com/U1nkfHIHSr— Can You Pet the Dog? (@CanYouPetTheDog) April 17, 2019
As you can see in the tweet above, Fortnite's pet feature might be the most half-assed addition to a game we have ever seen. It's not a pet, not a stroke, it is barely even an acknowledgment. In fact, as pointed out by Kotaku, it looks like Epic has simply repurposed the door opening action.
Just to demonstrate that the above was not a one-off, below is a video created by GoGoGamer showing that the action is always as ineffective. We're surprised that the animals even react to it as it looks more like a slap in the face than an affectionate pet. The last thing we want to do is slap the companions that we have grown to love.
There are plenty of games out there where you can really go to town when it comes to making a fuss of virtual dogs. Fortnite, as it stands, you do not make that prestigious list. Once we are done obsessing over your Endgame LTM, so about ten days from now, you had better get to work on fixing your pet function. In fact, if you're not going to fix it, then scrap it altogether.