In most game narratives, you can usually find a good balance between friendly folks who want to help you on your way and obvious thugs monsters who seek to do you harm. Some games, however, aren't content with that balance. No sir, it's not a real ball game until absolutely everything wants you dead.

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When we say everything, we mean even the things that normally wouldn't want you dead. That wall? It wants you dead. That piece of fruit? It wants you dead. The very passage of time? Well, that always wanted you dead, but now it's not even being subtle about it.

10 The World's Worst Theme Park - Illbleed

Dreamcast Illbleed Exploring
Illbleed Exploring

You always hear rumors about people dying in theme parks, but for Illbleed, those numerous deaths are treated as free press coverage. The premise of Illbleed, both in terms of the titular theme park and the game itself, is that you need to use your senses to defuse various tricks and traps scattered around the attractions.

If you're not vigilant, you'll either have numerous sharp objects stuck into places you'd rather not have them, or you'll be spooked so bad you have a heart attack. Or both. Often both! There are several instances throughout the game's story where the park workers will brag about how many guests they've killed, and the rest of the world is just sort of... okay with that for some reason.

9 The Internet Frustration Classic - I Wanna Be The Guy

I Wanna Be The Guy Screenshot Of Many Spikes

While the idea of games deliberately engineered to be torturously difficult can be traced back to various ROM hacks released in 2007, the freeware monstrosity that is I Wanna Be The Guy was one of the games to really popularize the concept. It is genuinely not possible to beat this game on a first try because everything can kill you instantly, and often in completely arbitrary ways.

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See those cherries on the first screen? Yep, they'll kill you. The spike pit that seems really easy to jump over? Well, it's not so easy when the pit suddenly extends and swallows you up. That's even mentioning all the gigantic boss fights. You don't know pain until you've been slugged into next week by a gigantic Mike Tyson.

8 Animated With Malicious Intent - Earthbound

earthbound thunder and storm

Earthbound's stable of enemies features some sensible members like wild animals or street thugs, but as you progress through the game, things get steadily weirder. Ramblin' Evil Mushrooms, dogs made of solid carbon, animated marionettes, and more will all try to take a swing at Ness and company given the opportunity.

According to the game's story, all of these bizarre enemies, as well as instances of seemingly-normal people attacking you, are the result of a wave of passive evil mojo emanated by Giygas. Giygas's very presence brings life to the inanimate and draws out the latent hostility in the hearts of man, and they would all prefer you not get in his way.

7 Dr. Jekyll's Stressful Day - Dr. Jekyll And Mr. Hyde

Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde NES Game

There are few things more annoying to live with than a stress-powered superhuman alter ego, and if there are two people who can attest to that, it's Dr. Bruce Banner and Dr. Henry Jekyll. You wouldn't think Victorian London would be that stressful of a place to live, but in the Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde NES game, every single person in the city seems hell-bent on ruining your day, from children with slingshots to random passerby just clubbing you upside the head.

That wouldn't be so much of a problem if all that stress didn't unleash Mr. Hyde, who is similarly menaced by bizarre supernatural creatures of the night. Dr. J just can't catch a break.

6 Never Annoy A Disembodied Brain - Brain Dead 13

Witch attacking Lance in Brain Dead 13

In the opening cutscene of Brain Dead 13, snarky young computer repairman Lance meets the disembodied brain of Dr. Nero Neurosis, who very obviously has a plan to take over the world. Lance calls Dr. Neurosis's plans a bit played out, and the doctor throws a full-blown temper tantrum, sicking all of his castle's monstrous residents on Lance as payback for his snark.

In addition to outsmarting these various creeps to stay alive, Lance always has to stay moving in this game because Dr. Neurosis's henchman Fritz is always on his tail. Just staying idle on a screen for a few seconds too long will result in an instant and often silly death at Fritz's hands. Er, hooks.

5 The Many Deaths Of King Graham - King's Quest Series

Graham gets punched out by a bear in King's Quest 5

King Graham and his family are known throughout Daventry and beyond for being wise and just folks, but that's banking on the assumption of competent player control. In just about any King's Quest game, a simple misstep can lead to all manner of sudden, violent deaths from unexpected sources, from being suddenly tackled off a mountain by a ravenous yeti to being strangled by a gaggle of sentient ivy.

There was a reason Sierra's old adage was "Save early, save often" - because you were never more than a few moments away from sudden death in their games.

4 The Land Itself Hates You - S.T.A.L.K.E.R. Series

Zone concept art from STALKER 2

The alternate history version of the Chernobyl Exclusion Zone that is explored in all the S.T.A.L.K.E.R. games isn't just a radioactive hellscape full of vicious thugs and wild animals. Due to the nature of the secret experiment that resulted in the creation of the Zone in the first place, the Zone itself exhibits a level of sentience in the form of the Common Consciousness, and it's not huge on Stalker pests roaming its confines.

This is the reason that the Zone is full of not just monsters and mutants but dangerous, supernatural phenomena; it's all a sign that the Zone doesn't want you there, and it's all too happy to end your life if you start poking around where you're not wanted.

3 Snakes, Spikes, And Cavemen, Oh My - Spelunky Series

Guy Spelunky Attempts The Sun Challenge

If you'd expect anywhere to be absolutely crawling with death traps, it'd be an ancient Incan temple. Those ancient societies were so great at building death traps, weren't they? Of course, it's hard to be interested in them in Spelunky, where they're all aimed squarely at your forehead.

From oodles of spikes and lava covering every conceivable surface to the populations of fiercely territorial wild animals, not to mention fiercely paranoid shopkeepers, the only truly safe place in Olmec's Temple is outside of it. You wouldn't be much of an adventurer if you were deterred by endless death traps, though, which is why you gotta keep trying and trying.

2 "Prepare To Die" Edition - Dark Souls Series

dark souls You Died screen

From the very beginning, the Dark Souls series has made no effort at disguising its joy in chewing up and spitting out players. That is, presumably, why the definitive edition of the first game was literally called the "Prepare to Die" edition. Everyone who plays a Dark Souls game knows what they're getting into.

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You're gonna die, and you're gonna die a lot, and you're gonna die a lot in really frustrating ways, from getting curb-stomped by an army of skinny dudes with swords to getting literally stomped by several giant monsters. Even when you try to be proactive and get the jump on those legions of baddies, odds are good there's another gaggle of them waiting just around the corner to curb-stomp you all over again.

1 The Underworld's Worst Theme Park - CarnEvil

A Smilin' Bob in CarnEvil

While you could say that every rail-shooter ever made qualifies as a game where everything is trying to kill you, one shooter that deserves special recognition is that classic progenitor of childhood nightmares, CarnEvil. Everything in this carnival of the damned wants you dead, and they are just downright gleeful about it.

From the pimply teenage ghouls in the Rickety Town food court to the disembodied hands jutting out of the Haunted House's walls, if it is ambulatory, it's probably going to try and tear your throat out. In fairness to the undead carnies, though, the legend of CarnEvil literally states that they're going to do all of that if you revive them, so it's kind of your own fault for feeding Umlaut the token.

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