Ahhh... childhood. It was a simpler time. A care-free period when all we had to worry about was having the coolest toys or wondering whether or not we were going to be getting dessert. But even though most adults are not going anywhere near the toy aisle anytime soon (Legos don't count... everyone knows those are for adults), that doesn't mean that toymakers are not still hawking little plastic desirables to kids all over the world. After all, according to the US Toy Association, the American toy industry banked over $20 billion in revenue last year alone.

Though everyone remembers the Furbies and the Tickle Me Elmos of the world, sometimes a plaything misses the mainstream; and for good reason. Toy manufacturers have a long history of missing the mark and creating items that are a bit ridiculous and a whole lot inappropriate for children. From innuendo to downright ridiculous "who let that off the drawing board?" items, there are near countless examples of when questionably ethical toys have been marketed to kids. This is probably why, shortly after they reach the public, they are quickly brushed under the rug by the manufacturers.

15 Super Soaker Meets Ooze

amazon.com

We are starting this list off with easily one of the worst offenders in the history of toys: The Oozinator. At first glance, it would be easy to discount this toy as just another Super Soaker. It is your basic pump and shoot water gun that gets the job done on those hot, summer afternoons. The only difference with this gun, however, is that it can also shoot ooze. Using a special "ooze cartridge" and by pumping a second ooze handle the device shoots a viscous ooze.

14 Not The Best Place For A Trigger

via amazon.com

As long as there have been toys, TV shows and films have tried to capitalize on their characters by licensing our favorite heroes for toys and other tie-ins. It makes sense that a toy company would want to stretch these licenses as far as possible and smash Batman or Spider-Man into every product they can think of. And, when that happens, we get alarming stuff like this. Why Batman is coughing up liquid is still a mystery. Either way, the placement of those triggers isn't ideal.

13 Not The Most Huggable Plush Toy

via amazon.com

Man, there is nothing kids love more than roadkill. This plush cat comes complete with a tread mark, missing eye, and tongue hanging out of its head. The toy comes with a little poem (much like its tamer Beanie Baby counterparts) that is a little rhyme about not looking both ways when crossing the street. There's a velociraptor in the same series of plush-toys, but this one takes the cake for being an especially inappropriate children's toy. There is just something about encouraging kids to play with roadkill that rubs me the wrong way.

12 Playd-oh No

via: youtube.com

Play-Doh is one of the great childhood toys. Along with Lego, it is one of the originators of imaginative toys intended to nurture the creativity in children. And it tastes great too! Ok, that last part was just a joke (was it?), but Play-Doh really is one of the most wholesome playthings for kids. Unfortunately, a lot of their products are food-based. It's important to let kids know that ingesting the mixture is a very bad idea. Suggestive icing pipes aside, it does produce delicious-looking pseudo-confectionaries.

11 Squirt Guns Are Everywhere

I mean, you just can't make this stuff up. Perhaps there was a time when a toy like this would have gone unnoticed. Those days are gone and this two-finger squirt gun is just a bad joke. The premise is benign enough. It's a squirt gun in the shape of two fingers, pow-pow. This little treasure gets itself into trouble with the combination of fingers and name. It's another example of an "imaginative idea" that just ends up translating into an inappropriate kid's toy.

10 Children's Toy Plushies

via shop.swedentoys.com

That's right, you too can be the proud owner of a pair of soft, plush waste! I get that we need to assimilate kids to the joys of using the bathroom, but giving them bean-filled monstrosities to play with seems like an odd and decidedly dangerous precedent to set. There are definitely better ways to teach a young child about certain, necessary things. Not everything needs to be a plush toy.

9 Imagine The Back Pain

via kennercollector.com

There is no doubt that everyone in the world hopped on their dad's back to go for a ride at least once during their childhood. Imagining your father as a bustin' bronco and going for a spin around the living room is a memory we can all cherish forever. However, the implications of this accessory really ruins the whole thing. There's a reason that bouncy horses and scootable ride-ons were invented.

8 Nimbus Two-Thou-Whoa!

via karvelio.com

I'm not really sure where the designer of this toy came up with this one. Harry Potter toys are obviously a no-brainer. A Nimbus 2000 broomstick for kids to run around the yard on? Duh! The weird thing about this toy is, why does it vibrate?! Are magical brooms known to vibrate? This one is a bit notorious for receiving a lot of fake reviews and comedic write-ups.

7 Skipper Grows Up

via: myvintagebarbies.com

Bodies change. It is one of those horrible facts of life. We all remember how weird it is to start going through those changes. So it's a novel idea from an educational standpoint to create a toy that lets everyone know that they are not the only ones experiencing these changes. However, maybe this isn't that toy. This version of Barbie's little sister, Skipper, allows her legs to grow and her chest to pop out.

6 E.T. Phone Home

via: 2warpstoneptune.com

This is one of the few toys that is actually worse when it is just sitting in the box. How did this ever make it onto store shelves? The toy has a good enough message. We have all seen the movie. E.T. can basically use his finger to heal wounds and, when doing so, the tip of his finger lights up. It's a cool concept and it could have been a cool toy, but they should have made the whole hand. Just one of E.T.'s fingers on its own looks terrible.

5 Some Toys Should Definitely Be Scrapped

via YouTube.com (Channel Wild Ones)

When The Lion King came out it blew audiences away. We all remember at the end of the opening scene when the baboon, Rafiki, raises Simba into the air and presents him to the whole animal kingdom. It was a powerful and evocative scene that to this day sends chills down my spine. So why wouldn't Disney immortalize this scene in the form of a toy? The premise is simple enough. You push Rafiki's tail and he lifts Simba into the air. Release and Simba is lowered again. The problem is that the toy does not work properly and, no matter how hard you push on the tail, he only lifts Simba a few millimeters upward.

4 More Glaring Design Issues

via YouTube.com (Top Trending)

This toy is a tough one to figure out. Supposedly, this Pooh toy was pulled very shortly after it was released and no one seems to really know what you are supposed to do with it. Initially, many thought it might be a ring toss toy, but then noticed the buttons on the cone. It's pretty clear that the cone is supposed to be honeycomb, but that doesn't really matter. This one is simply weird all around.

3 Superman To The Rescue

via Pintrest.com (gee whiz watson)

This is jarring at first glance. At least the pillow is not just his face. If you look closely you can see a child playing with Superman's whole upper body. That gaping mouth is unnervingly disconcerting. It is also not even like his ice breath is his go-to weapon. We all think about Superman's super-strength or his ability to fly. His laser vision and supersonic hearing come to mind even before his freezing breath does. Man, Superman has too many abilities.

2 The Kiddie Taser

via ufunk.net

Is the Kiddie Tazer a terrible idea? Yes. Does the idea of zapping a kid with an electrified prod make me giddy inside? Absolutely. Is this product probably fake? Almost definitely. At least, hopefully, it is. There have been a lot of strange, dark, and downright inappropriate kid's toys over the years. Sometimes it's hard to tell what's fake and what actually slipped through the cracks.

1 Shave The Baby

via Pintrest.com (Dennis Carter)

Once again, toymakers provide us with yet another amazingly inappropriate product. The premise is simple, you shave the baby. It's not really clear why a baby would require shaving unless it's a baby werewolf. This is another classic example of a toy that tried to play on the hype of certain big-name sellers. Unfortunately, it falls very flat and ends up looking just plain weird.