Back in the day, when I was a hip young dude and not the cynical old miser I am now, Pokémon was simpler. There were only 150 of the things (Mew just being an old wives tale that hid under a truck), and we knew and loved them, craptacular old sprites and all.

If you felt a little out of the loop after the Pokémon Red and Blue days, you’re not alone. The series just celebrated its twentieth-anniversary last year, and that’s a long darn time. If Ash actually aged like a regular dude, he’d been in his mid-thirties with a mortgage and stock portfolio and all that sort of crap by now.

My point is, things have changed around here. There are now 800+ different Pokémon. If we count Mega forms, Primal forms and all of those shenanigans too, the figure’s probably closer to a thousand. Teams only have space for six, but Game Freak have devised a handy system to make team choices easier for players: an elite handful of Pokémon make all others pretty well obsolete.

Whichever format of competitive Pokémon you’re playing, you’ll have the commonly-seen ‘mon. The powerhouses. This is competitive play, after all, and that means only using the very best (like no-one ever was).

So here’s the question. Are you ready to tango with some of the greatest, most OP sweepers and unbreakable walls in Pokémon? You’d better be, because they’re waiting to meet you. Let’s hop right on in.

15 A Mirror Of Combat

Is there any Pokémon more unassuming than Ditto? Just look at the little guy. It may resemble something that you’d serve with ice cream at Little Jimmy’s third birthday party, but don’t be fooled. Underestimate this gelatinous little a-hole for a second, and it’ll crush your soul into sad, teeny fragments of defeat and broken dreams.

Ditto is, by its very nature, about as situational as it gets. With its new ability, it will automatically take the form of the opposing Pokémon on switching in. That includes its exact moveset. As a result, it can be horribly powerful or utterly worthless, depending on the circumstances. It’s an incredible weapon against set up sweepers in particular, though, stealing all of their boosts and usually outspeeding them with the Choice Scarf it likes to hold. When you can pull this off well, it’s a terrifying thing to behold.

14 Essentially Flawless

Some Pokémon are just far too good. They’re introduced in a generation, and immediately dominate competitive play. Over the years, as more games are released, the metagame will shift dramatically around them. There’ll always be a place for them, though, because they’re just that effective.

One prime example would be Garchomp. This Ground/Dragon type has meta competition from Landorus, but will always be the top choice where Landorus is banned (which it usually is). It’s fast, powerful, and relatively bulky, and is just as effective in doubles as singles. Some thought that Garchomp would be hampered by the newly-rampant Fairy types, especially the Tapus, but it’s still out there partying with the best of them.

The land shark is essentially a flawless Pokémon, beyond that glaring 4x Ice weakness.

13 The Hidden Ability

Oh, Talonflame. How we all loathed you in the early days of X and Y.

When we found Fletchling in the wild, at the start of our adventures in sixth gen, we had no idea what a Grade A a-hole it would turn out to be. Generally, as fans know, ‘Route 1 Birds’ suck ass (Staraptor being the exception). Talonflame has no defenses at all to speak of, and it’s not packing too much offensively either. However, much like Mega Kangaskhan, it’s that ability that made it a true monster.

The hidden ability Gale Wings gave Talonflame priority on Flying moves. Priority Choice Band Brave Bird was absurdly powerful, and was an instadeath sentence to Fighting types (or really anything that couldn’t take it). Fortunately, also as with Mega Kangaskhan, Gale Wings was nerfed for seventh gen, to only work when the user is at full HP.

12 Is Love. Is Life.

What was there before Arceus? Nothing, that’s what. Arceus is the creator of everything in the Pokéverse. Before Arceus, there was nothing. Just a dark void, before even Friends reruns. Arceus is everything. Arceus is love. Arceus is life.

The god of all Pokémon, naturally, rates pretty highly on the holy-hell-super-powerful scale. He made the scale, after all, so can put himself wherever he damn well pleases on it. The curious thing is, no one of Arceus’s stats are particularly excessive by ubers standards; a round 120 across the board. It’s the combination of them that makes it a monstrously powerful all-rounder.

In battle, Arceus is usually seen firing off its patented Extreme Speed Normal STAB set. It’s also great at plugging particular holes in teams, thanks to its ability to equip a certain plate and become any type the team needs.

11 You're In For A Bad Time

Suicune is another of those Pokémon that isn’t ‘powerful’ in the conventional sense. If you’re looking for raw attack or special attack, you’ve come to the wrong place with this one. The Water dog/beast/gerbil (whichever term you prefer for these guys) can be quite a threat offensively, but only with a couple of Calm Mind boosts.

What Suicune does have going for it is its monstrous bulk. It has great mixed defenses, which can make it a real nightmare to beat. Physical attackers hate it for its ability to burn them with Scald, coupled with the Rocky Helmet it likes to hold. Special attackers, meanwhile, can be surprised by a hail Mary Mirror Coat, a move which deals back twice the damage the user just took. Throw in a Rest or two to fully restore its health, and Suicune is a bad time to face all around.

10 A Peculiar Strength

Shedinja is one of the most peculiar Pokémon of all. A brilliant little addition to the roster, it is born for ‘free’ when a Nincada evolves and there’s a space in your party.

Oftentimes, on the rare occasions you’ll fight one of these things, it’ll go one of two ways: Very well, or very badly. Shedinja, if you didn’t know, has only a single point of HP. It’s protected by its ability, Wonder Guard, which means it can only be hit by moves that it is weak to. As a Bug/Ghost, there are a buttload of these, but you’re right down Crap Street if you don’t have a move that can take it out. As a last ditch effort, weather effects and status moves can also do the job. Shedinja is super hard to set up, but when you do, your opponent is really powerless against it.

9 Don't Wake The Beast

Granted, Snorlax is one of my OG favorite Pokémon of all time, but let’s not let that become any kind of a factor here. When you’re this damn much of a boss, there’s no personal bias necessary.

For twenty years now, Snorlax has been a good pick for teams. With its gigantic HP and special defense (not to mention the great dearth of Fighting type special moves, its only weakness), this guy has been brushing off special attackers like the Terminator since 1996.

In this year’s official Nintendo tourney rules (Alola Pokédex), it’s the huge furry threat it’s always been. A very popular set today is the Stockpile Recycle one, which can boost both of its defenses while continually healing. When played carefully, the opponent can barely put a scratch in its chunky butt.

8 It Laughs At You

Speaking of huge adorable squishy lumps that never freaking die ever, here comes Chansey. This one differs a little from its evolved form, Blissey, but players hate them both with the flaming passion of a billion suns. Let’s take a look at why.

All those virtues that Snorlax has? The Normal typing, the great special defense? The HP stat as high as the Chrysler Building? These blobby little ladies have all of those too. They also have one thing on top that Snorlax only dreams it could have: actual reliable recovery in Softboiled. Not forgetting Aromatherapy, which lets them remove all status from the team. Then there’s the Eviolite Chansey has equipped, which makes it even more bulky. This is a bad, bad time, and you can be left in some real checkmate positions by these two.

7 Lol. Have Fun, Bro

Now we’re really descending to the seedy depths of competitive Pokémon. A lot of the ‘mon we’ve seen so far, such as Suicune, Furfrou and Blissey, are darn difficult to beat because they take hits so effortlessly. They heal themselves, wear you down, all of that super fun stuff. There’s another band of Pokémon who take a different approach. The likes of Clefable are tough to beat because you can’t freaking hit them with anything.

Clefable is one of the most notorious users of the evasion strategy. This centers around the use of the moves Double Team or Minimize, which boost the Pokémon’s evasion. Essentially, this is the same as reducing the accuracy of the opponents’ moves, only they can’t switch out or reset the effect. I’ve seen a Clefable take out an entire team single handed, simply because the opponent couldn’t hit it with anything.

6 You Shouldn't Have Come Here

Man oh man, my first sighting of this thing in Pokkén Tournament. That was a sad day, right there.

Mewtwo, as we all know, was once the supreme being, the most feared ‘mon of all. So much so, he was post-game content only, back in the days before post-game content was even recognized as a thing. Oh, the hours spent mashing up and B to catch it because my buddy at school assured me that worked.

You’d probably agree that this guy was more than enough of a powerhouse as it was. Then came two separate Mega forms, and Pokkén’s Dark Mewtwo. The latter has very little HP, but will send a dizzying amount of elemental powers all over the darn screen at you. And let’s not even go into how popular Dark Mewtwo is as a character online.

5 Momma's Coming

That’s right, friends, we’re kicking this shindig off the right way. Where better to begin than with one of the most fearsome Pokémon ever created?

Prior to X and Y, Kangaskhan really wasn’t much of a factor. An entirely average, obscure Normal type that rarely saw the light of day. The power of Mega evolution, however, made this thing as formidable as Jurassic Park III’s Spinosaurus. And if you saw that angry bugger whup the T-Rex’s sorry ass, you’ll know what a statement that is.

Statistically, Mega Kangaskhan wasn’t really that excessive. It was its ability, Parental Bond, that made it the beast it was. This gave each attack a second hit, half as powerful as the first, representing the baby taking a shot too. This damn thing was everywhere in competitive play, and so was nerfed with Sun and Moon (the second hit is now 25% of the first).

4 Uber Till The End

In the uber tier, Lugia is known as the Great Wall. Like Suicune, this Psychic/Flying type has superb mixed defences, and can be customised and tailored to suit the needs of the rest of the team it’s on. Do you want to be more physically-oriented? Specially? Lugia’s got you covered. Whatever your walling needs, Lugia will ensure that your opponents SHALL NOT PASS. Just think Gandalf, only with more wings and less beard.

As a Flying type, Lugia has access to a move that Suicune is eternally jealous of: Roost. Not only is this reliable healing, but it also allows Lugia to shed its Flying typing for that turn, removing the super effectiveness of Ice, Electric and Rock moves (if you happen to be faster than your opponent). To further bolster its unsinkable nature, Lugia also gets the rare ability Multiscale, which halves all damage it takes from full HP.

3 Rock, Paper, Dead.

There aren’t many non-legendary Pokémon who have been banished to ubers, but Aegislash is among them. Competitive community Smogon were terrified by this thing on its release, and it was deemed too damn powerful for standard play for a variety of reasons.

A lot of Pokémon can change form. Aegislash has both a Blade Forme and a Shield Forme, which it can switch between by using the move King’s Shield. Aegislash’s Blade Forme has incredible offenses and slim-to-bupkus defenses, while the opposite is true of its Shield Forme. The kicker is, it’s quite a slow Pokémon to boot, and so it’s quite tough to hit while it’s vulnerable. Battling Aegislash, then, is a game of outsmarting it. It isn’t able to spam its shield, so predicting around it is the key to tangoing with this beast.

2 Don't Let The Looks Fool You

I know. I hear your cries. Fur-freaking-frou, of all things? What kind of purely medicinal substances are you smoking? Just hear me out, I have my reasons.

It’s true enough that, when it comes to offense, Furfrou is about as threatening as a one-legged arthritic kitten in a coma. It’s also true that all of its stats leave something to be desired. This thing, though, is unbeatable in an entirely different sort of way.

The Poodle Pokémon’s ability, Fur Coat, is shared only with Alolan Persian. It halves all physical damage that the Pokémon takes. Couple this with its access to Cotton Guard (a move that instantly boosts its defense by three stages), and you can see the problem. When there’s a Furfrou around, for the sake of every strand of Thor’s luxurious beard, ALWAYS keep a special attacker on hand or you’ll never take it out.

1 Ash’s Pikachu

Okay, sure. If we’re going to be pernickety here, our old buddy Ash and his beloved Pikachu have been defeated countless times. Let’s not forget, however, that Ash is pretty darn ropey as a trainer, and his Pikachu does its best to do all of the heavy lifting on his behalf.

Umpteen seasons later, the little guy is still waiting to evolve to Raichu. Despite the fact that, by the games’ standards, it’s probably about level 10,005 by this point in the timeline.

Still, why would it need to evolve? Ash’s Pikachu has never given an eff. Not a single one. It doesn’t care about type advantage, type disadvantage, any of that frivolous nonsense. It can just aim for the horn and demolish opponents it shouldn’t be able to touch at all.