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Once you've found and married your true love in Stardew Valley, you'll be able to have kids. You're limited to a maximum of two kids, and there are some things you'll need to do before the game gives you the option at all.

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Never fear — when it comes to having children, Stardew Valley makes it much easier than real life. For everything you need to know about getting married, what to expect when you're expecting, and how children behave in-game, look no further than this guide. We will explain how to have kids in Stardew Valley and much more.

Updated November 18, 2023 by Jacqueline Zalace: Children in Stardew Valley can be a bit bland, especially if you've gone through the process several times. We've updated this guide with some great mod options that tweak the mechanics of having children.

How Do Children Work?

player standing in nursery room

There are a couple of things to know about having kids in Stardew Valley. You're limited to two kids — one boy and one girl. The gender of your first child is chosen at random, while the gender of the second is whichever the first child wasn't.

You'll always be presented with the option to have children, and they'll never be a surprise.

Finally, you are able to have children whether you are in an opposite- or same-gender partnership. If you are married to someone of the opposite gender, you'll have kids, and if you're married to someone of the same gender, you'll adopt. This guide will refer to both having and adopting children as "having" for ease of reading.

How Old Do Your Children Get?

They grow up over time, but they stop at the toddler stage and never age past it. Your children will never fully grow into teens and adults, putting them in a bizarre state of eternal childhood.

Prerequisites To Having Children

player in multiple relationships

You'll need to meet certain criteria before the game lets you add kids to your family. The requirements are as follows:

  • Be married for at least seven days
  • A ten-heart friendship level (at least) with your spouse
  • A farmhouse upgraded twice that contains a nursery with a crib

There is a renovation that allows you to remove the crib, which will also remove the ability to have children. Be sure to not remove the crib if you plan on having children!

After your child is fully grown (into a toddler), you can then remove the crib. Your kid sleeps in a nearby bed instead of the crib once they get a bit older.

How to Get Married

Stardew Valley Wedding Marrying Haley

Once you've reached a friendship level of eight hearts with a marriage candidate, you can purchase a bouquet from Pierre's General Store. When you give it to your beloved, the two of you will enter a relationship and your heart level will be unlocked, allowing you to level it up to ten hearts.

At this point, you won't be married yet, just dating. To marry, you will need to get two more relationship hearts.

When you reach ten hearts, you'll be able to purchase a Mermaid's Pendant from the Old Mariner, who shows up on the east side of the Beach (you'll need to upgrade the broken bridge with 300 wood if you haven't already) when it rains. He'll only sell it to you if you've upgraded your house to have a kitchen (the first upgrade).

stardew valley - old mariner selling you a mermaid's pendant

Give the Mermaid's Pendant to your partner and your wedding will take place three days later. You'll need to be married for a week before the option opens up to have kids, given that the other requirements are met as well.

For more information on marriage, you can check out individual guides for each candidate below.

Each guide goes over the marriage process as well, making sure to get it just right!

Maintaining Friendship With Your Spouse

Stardew Valley - giving Elliott a gift

Unlike the other villagers, your friendship level with your spouse will always decay over time. Luckily, it's pretty easy to keep it at ten hearts (or higher).

Ensure that you speak to them most days, if not every day. Give them gifts they like when possible, and don't do things that upset them (like giving them hated gifts or hitting them with a slingshot). This should keep your heart level at ten hearts or more, which is required to have kids.

Your spouse can become jealous if you talk/give gifts to other marriage candidates. It may go without saying, but don't cheat on your spouse!

Upgrading Your Farmhouse

player standing in front of robins house

The final thing you need in order to have children is an upgraded farmhouse. The first upgrade adds a kitchen and allows you to get married, but you'll need to upgrade it a second time to unlock children. The second upgrade adds a nursery with a crib and two single beds.

player talking to robin about nursery upgrade

The first upgrade costs 10,000 gold and 450 wood, and it will take Robin three days to finish. Next, you'll need 50,000 gold and 150 hardwood for the second upgrade and nursery, which will also take three days.

Marrying In Multiplayer

Stardew Valley  - Traveling Merchant on left, Wedding Ring recipe on right (1)

If you are playing Stardew Valley in multiplayer mode with a friend, getting married works a bit differently. Rather than getting the Mermaid Pendant, you will need to craft a Wedding Ring with the following materials.

  • 5x Iridium Bar
  • 1x Prismatic Shard

The recipe for the Wedding Ring can be purchased from the Wandering Merchant for 500g. There is no relationship level with other players, so you can get married immediately without getting to know each other.

Having/Adopting Kids

option for player to adopt child

Once all of these criteria are met, you will be able to have kids. At night, there is around a five percent chance that your spouse will ask if you want kids.

Saying Yes

If you agree to have kids, the baby will be born or the adoption process will finish 14 days later.

  • When you wake up on the fourteenth day, there will be an infant in the crib.

Saying No

You can say "not now" without consequence. Your spouse will simply accept your answer, go to sleep, and maybe ask at a later date, so long as the requirements are still met.

How to Have Kids in Stardew Valley Multiplayer

If you are playing a multiplayer/co-op file, and you marry another player, you can still have children.

The main player will be asked randomly if they want to have a child, similar to the query when married to an NPC. If they say yes, the farmhand will then be asked as well. If they say yes as well, the child appears in the same way as normal.

If either one of you says no, you will not have a child.

Stages Of Childhood

player standing in the nursery with their baby

Children go through four "stages" as they grow up. From the second stage onward, you can interact with your kid(s) to level up your friendship with them.

Stage

How Long Does It Last?

Description

1

14 Days

Your baby will remain in the crib. When you interact with them, it will just give you a message stating that they are sleeping.

2

14 Days

Now, your baby will stand in the crib, and you can toss them in the air; this will give you friendship points.

3

28 Days

Your child will leave the crib and crawl around the house, interacting with toys.

4

Forever!

In this stage, they're toddlers, and they run around the house. You can interact with them to raise your friendship level further.

You will be able to have a second child after your first one reaches the final stage and begins sleeping in one of the beds in the nursery, as the crib will now be free.

Friendships With Your Children

Stardew Valley Customizable Baby and Children Farmer stands in the middle of the room, with a green haired baby to the left, and a purple-haired toddler to the right

There are some differences in how friendship works when it comes to your own kids. First, they cannot be given gifts, and the friendship points you earn or lose at the Luau and from the Bulletin Board Bundle do not affect your relationship with your kids.

However, unlike your spouse, your friendship level with your kids will not decay once it reaches ten hearts, like the other villagers.

Overall, increasing the relationship with your children does nothing.

Dismissing Kids

player interacting with the shrine of selfishness

If you decide you don't want your kid(s) anymore, you can "dismiss" them. To do this, you'll need to have completed either the Community Center or Joja route, finished the Dark Talisman quest for the Wizard, and unlocked access to the Witch's Hut.

Inside the Witch's Hut, there are three shrines. One is called the Dark Shrine of Selfishness. By presenting a Prismatic Shard to this shrine, you can "dismiss" your children, which will turn them into doves and remove them from your family.

There is no way to reverse this once it is done, but it will allow you to have more children in the future.

What Happens Once Your Children Are Gone?

message on tv from children that are now gone

You should know that, if you're not a fan of creepy stuff, there are some scary things that happen after you dismiss children. First, you'll receive a phone call (if you have a phone) that seems to come from your abandoned kids. It will have an "otherworldly voice" that says "YOU HAVE FORSAKEN US."

Second, you'll encounter an Ancient Doll depending on which farm layout you have. If you have the Standard Farm, you'll see a weird channel on the TV on Fall 26. Selecting it will show an Ancient Doll that says "You've brought this upon yourself... now I'm free... Hee hee hee!" It will then pop out of the TV like the girl from The Ring.

If, on the other hand, you have the Four-Corners Farm, you might fish up an Ancient Doll when fishing on the farm.

ancient doll attacking player in witches hut

After you've encountered the Ancient Doll, a cursed one will show up at the Witch's Hut and fly around, attacking you. Once you kill it, it will turn into a bird and leave; but it will respawn every time you enter the hut.

Strangely, killing this doll counts for the Bats section of the Monster Eradication Goals.

What Are The Benefits Of Having Children?

player standing next to their child who has a hat on

Overall, there are no real benefits to having children that directly aid you. When you do decide to have children, your partner will no longer ask for them, which can be a benefit if you find these messages a bit annoying. In general though, you will not miss out on any content if you choose to not have children.

Once in the toddler stage, your children will attend festivals around the valley, which can liven up the scene. You can find them near your spouse, but they won't interact with any other NPCs.

Although there are no benefits, you will be able to put hats on your kids. Simply select the hat in your inventory and interact with your kids, the same way you place a hat on your horse or place materials into machines.

Mods That Improve Children

Stardew Valley Customizable Baby and Children Farmer stands in the middle of the room, with a green haired baby to the left, and a purple-haired toddler to the right

If you are a bit tired of the simplistic nature of children, there are mods to help you! Below, you can check out some helpful and unique mods to download.

Mod

Description

Customizable Baby and Children

Customize your children to look different

The Farmer's Children

Children have updated appearances and can now explore the town, go to school, and make friends

Babysitter

Children can now have schedules as well as have designated babysitters (NPCs in town)

Babies Take After Spouse Plus New Toddler Hair and Clothes

Children will look like your spouse

NEXT: Stardew Valley: Everything You Need to Know About The Volcano Dungeon