It's a tale as old as time. Boy meets girls, girl gets kidnapped by giant turtle monster, boy rescues girl, and boy and girl eat cake. This is the story of Mario and Princess Peach, two of gaming’s biggest icons. That simple story concept would be used for almost every Mario games. For all the times that the Mario series have used the basic premise of Bowser kidnapping the princess, Peach has truly been put through some horrible things.
Kidnapping is bad enough, but she also suffered from being possessed, being sucked into a nearby supernova, and constantly have her vacations be ruined by Bowser and his kids. For all the complaints gamers have towards Peach being useless, maybe we should give her a break. She goes through a lot within the spam of one game, let alone a whole series of games. She definitely suffers more than what Mario has to put up with, and she does it all while wearing the same pink dress day-in and day-out.
So that is why we are listing out the 15 Worst Things That Have Ever Happened To Princess Peach. While many fans may always see Princess Peach as a useless character, this list may shine light on the things Peach is force to endure in every game. She undoubtedly suffers from PTSD, and deserves to have more empathy from players, rather than ridicule.
15 She Just Can't Catch A Break
This is an obvious one, yet it is probably the biggest problem that the sweet innocent Princess faces in almost every game. It deserves to be repeated though, as Bowser is without question the biggest thorn in her side since the first Super Mario Bros. game. We all know the story: turtle monster meets girl, turtle monster kidnaps girl, and random plumber boy saves girl from turtle monster.
It is the same story in most Mario games, and you have to wonder why Princess Peach hasn’t gotten better security at this point. The prevailing theory is that Peach has Stockholm syndrome, and allows herself to be kidnapped by Bowser because she has grown attached to the giant turtle monster thing. If that is the case, then Stockholm syndrome is definitely no laughing manner, and she would need to see a professional to help with that.
14 An Interspecies Marriage
The recent Mario Odyssey trailers showcase Princess Peach being kidnapped (again) by Bowser. Apparently this time Bowser is setting up a wedding between himself and Peach, and it doesn’t seem like Peach has any say in the matter. She is going to marry Bowser against her will, and that is pretty messed up. We could go into what is considered consent and what isn’t, however just know this forced wedding is definitely not consent.
No one should force anyone else to do anything that they don't want to do–this is especially true when it comes to love and affection. If she doesn’t love you back, then you should move on rather than force your love onto her. Bowser has done many despicable deeds over his long career, which includes kidnapping fairy princesses and trying to create a whole new universe. Somehow though, forcing Peach to marry him feels like one of the worst things.
13 An Interspecies Marriage, Part Two
It is bad enough that in Odyssey Bowser is forcing the princess to marry him; at least it could be assumed that Mario will come in the last second to save the day. In Odyssey the main conflict centers on stopping the wedding between Bowser and Peach, but Super Paper Mario’s opening act is about the marriage between Bowser and Peach.
Yes, you heard that right. Bowser and Peach have finally tied the knot in the Paper Mario sequel. Oddly enough, this wasn’t Bowser’s plan. Count Bleck, the main antagonist of the game, forced Peach to marry Bowser in order to fulfill a prophecy and call forth the Chaos Heart. Bower was a willing pawn though, and Peach needed to be forced to say yes by Beck. Bowser’s and Peach’s marriage doesn’t seem like it was treated as the real deal in the end. It is possible they had an annulment during the events of the game.
12 She's A Regular Ariel
Bowser isn’t the only threat to Princess Peach and her kingdom; she has neighboring kingdoms to worry about as well. When the Beanbean Kingdom sent ambassadors to the Mushroom Kingdom during the events of Mario and Luigi: Superstar Saga, it turns out to be a trap. The ambassadors were actually the evil Cackletta and Fawful, who came to the Mushroom Kingdom to steal Princess Peach’s voice.
They succeed, and Princess Peach was stuck with an explosive vocabulary. Everything she tries to say just ends up becoming explosions. Mario and Luigi are then forced to team up with Bowser to go to the Beanbean kingdom. She would later be kidnapped by Bowletta, a monstrous fusion of Bowser and Cackletta.
11 Sorry, No Downtime For A Princess
Possibly after her millionth kidnapping from Bowser, Princess Peach was probably looking forward to having a nice vacation with Mario during Super Mario Sunshine. Traveling to Isle Delfino, the princess was most likely hoping to get some rest and relaxation on the beaches of the island. Of course, before that could happen something bad needs to occur. Trouble follows her, and even flying to a different place did not save her from all her problems.
Throughout Mario Sunshine, there is an evil Shadow Mario who is covering the entire town with strange paint. Mario is blamed for it since he and Shadow Mario look exactly alike. It turns out that Shadow Mario is actually Bowser Jr., and he believes Princess Peach is his mommy. Also, guess what? Bowser Jr. kidnaps Peach, forcing Mario to save her once again.
At least she is able to enjoy her vacation at the credits of the game.
10 Can't A Girl Get A Vacation?
Another vacation ruined by Bowser's offspring, Peach was enjoying some quality time of peace during the beginning of Super Mario World. She and the Mario Bros. were enjoying their time together on Dinosaur Island (or Dinosaur Land). Of course, nothing is ever that simple for the Princess, and in the opening act of the game, she has mysteriously vanished.
It is later revealed she has been kidnapped by the Koopalings and Bowser. Mario and Luigi are then forced to traverse the land to find her, stomping on every Koopaling. Though the brothers are able to successfully save her life from Bowser, it still doesn’t help that most of their vacation time has been wasted because of Bowser and his “children” (according to Nintendo, the Koopalings are not his kids, which is weird).
9 Journey To The Center Of The Universe
Super Mario Galaxy has the same outline as the other Mario games–Bowser kidnaps Peach, and Mario goes to rescue her. Instead this time Bowser has a more ambitious goal along with kidnapping the princess. He plans to create a whole new galaxy at the center of the universe, using Power Stars and Grand Stars to achieve his goal. He just wants Princess Peach to be his witness as a new universe in his image is born.
Mario saves Peach, like always, only this time Bowser’s universe suddenly becomes a supernova. Mario and Peach are able to survive the supernova, to only then face an even worse problem…
8 Watch Out For That Black Hole
The supernova at the end of Mario Galaxy quickly becomes a black hole, sucking in everything within sight. Princess Peach and Mario were pulled into a black hole, and with nothing for them to do, all hope seemed lost. Lucky for them the Lumas, star creatures who have aided Mario throughout the game, sacrifice themselves to have the Black Hole implode and create a new universe.
Peach and Mario (and Bowser) awaken safely in front Princess Peach’s Castle. While they are certainly lucky to be alive, everything from that point would seem trivial. Like, yeah, saving fairy princesses in Super Mario 3D Land is big and important, but after surviving a supernova and black hole, it feels like small potatoes. Of course, at this point we should all know that these sort of things are what Peach must endure on an almost daily basis.
7 A Princess Shouldn't Have To Fight
The Super Smash Bros. series are where Nintendo’s biggest stars get together and take part in an all-out brawl to see who's the best. Even the generally passive Princess Peach takes part in these fighting games.
Players may have a good time seeing their favorite Nintendo characters beating the stuffing out of each other, but it doesn’t look particularly fun for the characters themselves. Every match has the character hurting one another, all just for the chance to be called the best. Peach and the other characters must endure pain that would kill any normal person. This includes explosions, fireballs, getting knocked out by a baseball bat, falling off the edge of a stage, more explosions, electric strikes, getting slice and stabbed by different swords, etc. If there is a silver lining, it is that Peach now has the power to go to toe to toe with Bowser, and have some revenge.
6 Losing Her Color
In Paper Mario: Color Splash, Peach and Mario go to Prism Island to investigate a message they got from a toad. There they find the people and places have lost their color, being turned into colorless pieces of paper. It is up to Mario to give color back to the island, while Peach does nothing and look pretty. Eventually, Bowser is revealed to be the mastermind of the whole thing (what a shock!) and kidnaps Peach again.
Bowser then drains Peach of her color and frames her colorless form on top of his chair. For a monster that has tried to marry Princess Peach multiple times throughout the Mario franchise, it is kind of weird that Bowser would do something that cruel to her. Mario comes in and saves her like always, but what’s done been done. The memories being hung in Bowser's throne room are forever in her memories, and those cannot be stomped away like a Koopa Troopa.
5 I've Seen Things, Horrible Things
In Mario and Luigi: Bowser’s Inside Story, everyone’s favorite giant evil turtle swallowed something he shouldn’t have. Fawful, the same antagonist from Superstar Saga, gives Bowser the Lucky Mushroom, which forces him to inhale everything in sight. Peach and the Mario Bros. are inhaled by Bowser, trapping them inside.
Peach is then compelled to travel the inwards of Bowser; apparently, the inside of Bowser is just as large as a normal kingdom. There are many dangerous parts of Bowser that the Princess and the Mario Bros. have to safely travel across. If all Koopas have the same biology as Bowser, then it is a miracle that the Koopas have survived this long with all that going inside their body. Peach is definitely lucky to have gotten out of Bowser, but now she has seen things she wishes has never seen.
4 Sometimes A Girl's Just Gotta Be Evil
Bowser’s reasoning for kidnapping Princess Peach has never really been consistent. The most common reason why he wants Peach is either because he wants her to be his bride, or he wants her kingdom. Sometimes he just kidnaps her for the heck of it, as he didn’t really need a reason to take her in Super Mario Galaxy. With that said, Peach’s kidnapping is mostly used as a plot device to have Mario to go rescue her–there is rarely a greater purpose than that.
However, that is different in Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door. Instead of Bowser kidnapping her for the LOLs, she is instead kidnapped by a group who go by the X-Nauts. The X-Nauts want to open the Thousand-Year Door, and at the end of the game, the group uses Peach as a vessel for the evil Shadow Queen. Possessed, Peach serves as the final boss of The Thousand-Year Door. She is ultimately freed, although being possessed is surely no one’s idea of a pleasant time.
3 When Your Boy Cheats On You
One of Mario’s earliest handheld titles, Super Mario Land is a classic game for the original Game Boy. It had everything that any a normal Mario would have, just on the go. It had Mario jumping and trekking across a new, unexplored land. Each level was different from the last, and Mario was stomping on every enemy he could. He even has to save a princess, and it just wasn’t Princess Peach.
You heard that right. Mario went behind Peach’s back and saved a different princess. He ends up saving Princess Daisy in Super Mario Land–it can only be assumed that they also ate cake together afterward. Mario was one of the few consistent things in Peach’s messed up life, so having him essentially cheat her with a different Princess must be heartbreaking. At least Bowser wasn’t in Super Mario Land too, that’s a positive.
2 When Citizens Turn Into Blocks
No one really questions the plot of the original Super Mario Bros. It is so simple in both its presentation and gameplay that no one really bothers to question the greater meaning of the game. You just start out in the first stage, and you proceed to break blocks and stomp turtles.
Regrettably, there is a darker story underneath the story of the first Super Mario Bros., something that directly effects Peach. You see, in the manual for the game, it is revealed that the Koopa Troopas used dark magic to turn the citizens of the Mushroom Kingdom into blocks. We have to assume these are the same blocks that Mario carelessly smashes during his quest to save the Princess. He may end up saving Peach, but he inadvertently caused harm to the citizens of the Mushroom Kingdom. Having her entire kingdom turn into blocks is not a good look for any ruler. Having those blocks be smashed by an overweight plumber is an even worse look.
1 The Cycle Really Never Ends
Representation of women in fictional media has never been the best, yet has gotten better over the decades. Once roles that were meant to be exclusive to men are now being more gender equal, with women of different backgrounds and history taking up roles that require more agency. This has created a series of many awesome women in fiction, including video games. Characters like Samus Aran and Lara Croft have shown that not only women can do what men can, they can also do it better. Women's representation is still not perfect, but it is getting better.
With that said, some fictional women still feel forever trapped in roles given to them in a time when female characters were given very limited roles. Princess Peach is a prime example of a damsel in distress. She is constantly getting kidnapped and she has to have a man save her every time. There have been some titles where she does have a more active role, though as shown in the previews for Odyssey she always averts to her role as the one that needs to be saved. She’ll never have the same kind of agency or legacy as Mario, and she will probably always be seen as the prize that Mario earns at the end of every game.