Quick Links
The Sims 4's game-changing free update drops have added complex layers of customization to the already sprawling roster of options. Alongside the High School Years expansion pack, the EA team rolled out the sexuality hotfix update that, for the first time in Sims history, allows you to set your Sims' sexual orientation and ascertain that of your NPC crush.
Before plucking up the courage to hit on someone, try to suss out whether their interests match your own. Here's a guide to the sexual orientation system and how to use it for realistic gameplay.
Updated on May 3, 2023, by Axel Bosso: It looks like players are still looking for ways to customize their Sims sexual orientation and create new relationships with other characters. That's why we have updated this article, keeping it up to date in terms of style and formatting. Check it out to discover how to access the sexuality settings in The Sims 4.
Create-A-Sim Sexual Orientation Settings
If you're making your Sim from scratch in the Create-A-Sim menu, you can edit their gender and sexuality preferences in the gender panel to the left of the basic information window when you add a new Sim to the household.
The preferences are split into three categories.
Sims 4 Sexual Orientation Categories
|
Romantic Interests |
This indicates who your Sim will fall in love with. Your options are Man, Woman, or deselect both options to choose none. |
|---|---|
|
WooHoo or Mess Around Interests |
This indicates who your Sim will consider for a physical relationship. Your options are Man, Woman, or deselect both options to choose none. |
|
Exploration Options |
This indicates your Sim's openness to testing the waters of their romantic attractions. Ticking "no" will make them politely reject advances from Sims who don't match up to their romantic preferences. |
How To Change Your Sim's Sexual Orientation
If you're playing in Live Mode, or wish to edit your Sim's preferences further down the line - such as when a child ages up or if you're no longer open to exploring - you can edit these by clicking on a mirror and selecting "Change Sim".
This will open your Sim in Create-A-Sim, so you can simply make the necessary changes in the gender panel. Sexual orientation is pretty fluid by default in The Sims 4.
However, if you want to make the Sims 4 sexuality options a little more fleshed out, you can download the LGBT Mod. This community-made mod will give your Sim the option of selecting their own sexual orientation with definitive labels such as lesbian, gay, transgender, bisexual, asexual, and more.
You can have your Sims question their sexuality, and let the game randomly select a sexuality for you.
Bear in mind that, unless you actively set your in-game romantic and WooHoo preferences to match your modded sexuality, you might be alarmed when your lesbian Sim develops a crush on her male best friend.
The mod can be used with the existing base-game functions to create a more fleshed-out and comprehensive LGBT life for your Sims — which is what they deserve!
NPC Sexual Orientation
Butterflies swirl in your stomach as you stand before your crush, the love of your swooning teenage life, and ask them to Prom. Alas, you walk away with your heart in pieces and an Embarrassed moodlet, since your crush isn't into your sex that way. Bummer!
To avoid this happening, there are two ways to find out the sexuality of Sims in The Sims 4:
- Ask about their romantic/WooHoo/mess-around preferences. If your relationship with another Sim is high enough, allow your interest to be piqued and simply ask your crush what they're into. Even if you're not an option for them, it's better to be let down gently and save your pride.
- Shoot your shot and flirt with them. If you're not one to cosy up and get to know people before slinging the compliments, throw caution to the wind and flirt in order to discover a Sim's preferences. Just bear in mind that flirting with someone who isn't into you could land you with a powerful Embarrassed moodlet for a couple of hours.
When your Sim discovers the preference of another Sim, it will show up in their Sim Information panel. You can access this from your Friends window in the lower-right toolbar.
Once you know their attractions, your Sim won't be able to flirt with Sims whose interests don't include you.
If you really are desperate for your Sim to date an NPC that isn't compatible with them, you can always befriend them, add them to your household, and then edit their preferences in the Create-A-Sim menu using a mirror.
Make A Sim Romantically Interested In Another Sim With Cheats
If you want to cut to the chae, there is a way to get your Sims to fall in love with their NPC of choice by using cheats.
We've got a full guide to relationship cheats, which allow you to manually raise or lower both platonic and romantic relationships!