The Sims is a classic series that has enjoyed success since it first launched in the year 2000. Both hardcore gamers and casual players love The Sims. It has helped bridge the gap for those who wouldn’t tend to play video games. J.K. Rowling is purported to be a Sims player (and it just might be where she gets her ideas to off our favourites characters in morbid ways). The Sims has also enjoyed an abiding appreciation with sociopaths, who like to drown their poor Sims or trap them in houses made only of walls that get closer and closer. I, for one, find myself in the latter category. But as much as The Sims has contributed to the video gaming canon, it has also been criticized and ridiculed and enjoyed for a whole different reason— its own peculiar set of logic.
Being a simulation of everyday life, there are certain complexities and nuances that have eluded the developers even to this day. Even though they’ve tried to simplify every aspect of daily life, there are still some things that go horribly wrong in the game. These glitches in the AI and programming can make for some hilarious screenshots, and so we’ve compiled the best ones from across the far reaches of the internet. Ever see a mom take her baby for a walk through the river? What about proposing to your girlfriend with a sandwich? While that might be a bit of a head-scratcher in our world, it’s perfectly logical in The Sims.
Here are 25 The Sims hilarious logic memes.
25 Quit Moving!
The Sims have some unique programming. Their AI won’t always react in common sense ways the rest of us take for granted. Sometimes that can result in some delightfully quirky circumstances where your Sim gets trapped in a pool or maybe beats the oven until it works again. Other times, your Sim’s baby is on fire but they’re too busy typing away on the computer to notice or car. Hey, you gave them a task. And by golly, your Sim isn’t going to do anything else until that task is complete. Not even if it means saving their baby from a fiery end. You have to put that up on Instagram and twitter before the baby moves and ruins the whole photo.
24 Me And My Best Friend
Ah, yes. This meme brings me back… to earlier this morning when I was doing the same thing. Ever feel socially anxious and cut off from the world? The Sims 4 has brought the concept of social anxiety into your sweet refuge from social anxiety, your gaming life. The latest instalment of the hit series now includes a social skills category. Improving your skills is simple enough. All you have to do to is spend time talking to other people. Yeah, I hear you, if you knew how to do that you wouldn’t be spending your time playing The Sims. Unlike real life, The Sims 4 has a workaround which involves a delightful lapse in logic— you can talk to yourself in front of a mirror until you have the necessary social skills to face the big, scary world.
23 When Baby Needs A Bath
So every game’s got its environment glitches. Sometimes you can pass through walls or maybe someone’s hand passes through another character. Gamers tend to forgive these lapses of logic because they understand there’s only so much a developer can do, and if games have been reasonably bug-tested, we forgive minor glitches. That’s not the case in The Sims 4. When your Sim is taking their baby out for a stroll THROUGH A GOSH-DANG WATERPARK, that doesn’t count as a minor glitch. That’s bad bug-testing at best and a first-degree offence that should mom away for a very long time at worst. Gotta love how mom’s just strutting around here thinking she’s the best new mom on the block. This way her baby won’t ever need a bath again!
22 Under Pressure
Pools can be dangerous enough in the real world, but leave it to The Sims to find ways in making them the scene of a crime. Out of context, this image raises lots of questions — are Sims perishing because they can’t get out of the pool? Are there pool fights? What’s going on here!? But no, these aren’t just accidents, PCGamer says the pool expansions had led to the dreaded M word rate skyrocketing. In the world of The Sims, where a misplaced wall or even book can lead to an entire family’s disappearance, the addition of swimming pools can throw the whole simulation out of whack. Part of the fun (and face palming) is that your Sims are essentially big babies. They won’t get out of the pool if you don’t watch them every second.
21 I Think It's Going Well
Welcome to date night: the special Sims edition. So it’s a nice night out and you’re feeling frisky and maybe thinking of getting a little Woohoo, so you decided a date is in the cards. Your date arrives and so do you— but they don’t sit at the same table. In an empty restaurant. While this would be a sign that the date isn’t going particularly well in the real world, it’s a sign of quite the opposite in The Sims. According to their logic, you can sit at a table far away from your date and they’ll be perfectly satisfied at the end of the night. Right. It’s not unlike how I’ve been going on a date with Jennifer Lawrence since 2013. We’ve just been eating in different restaurants in different countries.
20 When You Gotta Propose But You're Hungry Too
Yes! Yes! A thousand times, yes! Ever hear of hiding the wedding ring in food? Well, according to The Sims, the food can be the ring. It doesn’t matter if your Sim is in the middle of a late lunch or you just came out from the bathroom, you can make him or her pop the question whenever you want. In the logic of The Sims universe, that can make for some very interesting scenarios. Like, for example, proposing while you’re still holding your lunch in your hands. Who wants to be this is exactly how Prince Harry proposed to Meghan Markle? He was probably still munching on a crumpet when he got down on one knee. All the best ones get their romance cues playing The Sims.
19 Low Expectations
It’s the thought that counts. And in this case, you didn’t think very much. But in The Sims, it would seem that matters very little. The game has a feature where your Sim can gift items to other characters, usually on birthdays or in the holiday celebration pack (yes, EA is a regular Scrooge that makes you pay extra to celebrate the holidays). Well, it turns out that you can give other characters some rather interesting gifts. Say, a head of lettuce. But according to Sim logic, they’ll thank you for getting anything at all — even if you give them gosh dang lettuce. Hey, it still beats getting socks.
18 He's Building A New Daughter
As the God of your Sims world, you can make your sims do just about anything you want. They are under your thrall and subject to your every whim. So it might be your Sim’s daughter’s graduation and they’ve waited eighteen years to see this day, but if The Sims overlord (aka you) wants to build a snowman instead, the Sim has to do it. Just as their daughter gets the diploma and her eyes search the crowd for her father’s face, she’ll see him making a new daughter in the snow instead. Don’t worry. The daughter may be traumatized and deeply damaged, but it’s nothing that a few high fives won’t fix. Just like that time you made your sim’s wife forgive him with high fives after he cheated on her.
17 Just A Regular Day
Ever think maybe The Sims has it right and we’re the ones who are backwards? Here we have a Sim doing a characteristically logical Sims activity— roasting a watermelon over a fire while sitting on a toilet. Yes, you read that right. I love that subtitle too— “your argument is invalid.” It’s like you have this crazy dude just sitting there off his rocker and the challenges you to question his logic. And somehow you can’t. In some weird Glitch-in-the-Matrix logical breakdown, it makes perfect sense. The next time somebody calls you out on anything, plant down with a roasted watermelon on your favourite toilet. I can promise without a doubt that they will leave you alone after that.
16 Five Games From Becoming Stephen Hawking
Okay, so on paper the logic makes sense: if you want your Sim in a cerebral and prestigious position like a surgeon, you increase their intelligence, right? The reasoning is unimpeachable. However, in The Sims, characters can increase their intelligence by playing chess just like they can increase their social game by talking to themselves enough in the mirror. And let’s just say the bar isn’t high for how many games of chess they gotta play either. After four games of chess, you can sign up for med school. You’re practically a genius! I mean, four games? You’re Bobby Fischer and Ben Carson all wrapped into one. If you play five games, that’s a surefire way to become Stephen Hawking.
15 Who Needs Applecare?
The reason why The Sims are so successful is because it manages to imitate real life. At least that’s the stated goal on paper. These memes show a different story. Every Sim player can relate to this one. Ever find yourself midway through a project on your computer when it breaks down? You want to kick and scream. You want to get on the phone and punish some poor unwitting Apple employee. The Sims solves this problem by making your characters break the warranty and try to fix the computer themselves. Of course, that’s what it’s supposed to look like. The end result is that your character is twisting a screwdriver on the keyboard. That’s pretty much how I would go about fixing a laptop if I’m being honest.
14 Sometimes Words Can Hurt You
The Sims is renowned for all its hilarious logical breakdowns, chief among them the ridiculous blockades that can stump your characters and even lead to their deaths. In this case, we have a regular Simsian Einstein thwarted by a book blocking the door. There’s no doubt that if that book is never moved and there’s nowhere else to go, the character would end up starving in the house. And they say words can’t hurt you. Maybe you enjoy it and you’re one of those players who likes to torture your poor little Sims. Also, can we talk about how this guy here looks a lot like Scumbag Steve? Maybe it’s just because they’re both wearing hats and standing in front of doorways, but that’s enough of a similarity for me.
13 Kumbayah, My Lord
The Sims are programmed to hold out their hands whenever there’s a big bonfire. That’s because they’re coded to react to their environments and it creates a sense of immersion. You too would hold out your hands to a bonfire! But that immersion tends to break down when The Sims hold out their hands and bask in the warm glow of any old fire— especially when it’s a house fire threatening to burn up everything in its path. According to The Sims logic, the best thing to do isn’t stop, drop, and roll, it’s just to roll with it. Well, natural selection I guess. These Darwin Award winners aren’t going to be around to bask in any warm bonfires ever again.
12 Fighting Over Dishes By 10 Pm
You know those couples that seem to move way too quick? Sometimes it can turn out great. Just ask my parents, who were living together three months after meeting each other. I’m talking about that good ol’ prelapsarian period before my parents rendered our family asunder in a vicious protracted divorce. The Sims takes moving too fast to a whole new level. In the famous series from EA, you can meet someone at 4 p.m., move in, and get married by 9 p.m. If you’re particularly quick you can start fighting over whose turn it is to do the dishes by 10 p.m. and sign up for an Ashley Madison account by 11 p.m. In the immortal words of Ron Burgundy, “that escalated quickly.”
11 You Don't Want To Know Where She Goes To The Bathroom
Is your son or daughter cooking in the bathroom? The good news is that maybe they’re a Sim. The bad news is that maybe they’re a hipster. We don’t know who started it first here; it’s a whole chicken and egg situation. But just as hipsters are too cool to cook in the kitchen and much prefer the bathroom (you don’t want to know which room they use as a bathroom), the Sims can sometimes get confused and start using the bathroom as an oven. The good news is you can get help. Chances are your Sim won’t make the same mistake twice, but if they do, you can just get them to put themselves out their misery. If you have a hipster, you’re unfortunately stuck with them.
10 We Have To Go Deeper
This one would make Xzibit proud. For all you kiddies out there who may be too young, rapper Xzibit had a show wherein he engaged in all manner of car upgrading. Every episode saw Xzibit learning about what things his drivers loved and then he would add Inception-level layers of those things to the cars. The internet was quick to pounce and make it a meme. Some say it’s where Christopher Nolan got his inspiration for Inception. Those people who say that are nobody but me. So anyway, a Sim playing The Sims within The Sims is a perfect use of the Xzibit meme. I feel like you got it right away and I just spent a whole paragraph killing the joke. Doesn’t matter, got paid.
9 Take That, Inanimate Object
Each action in The Sims has its own unique animation. When a character performs the action of preparing food, the animators obviously can’t show every little detail. That would be way too much. On the other hand, that’s no excuse for just having a character bang a hammer against the oven and call it a cooking animation. Then again, maybe the stove is Sim itself. It’s turned sentient. The only thing to do if you want higher quality food is punish it until it delivers. It’s like that movie The Brave Little Toaster but so much darker. Also, can we talk for a second about how weirdly attached Rob is to household appliances in that movie? No? Okay, never mind.
8 He Shouldn't Have Tried To Cross That Puddle
We’ve all been there. You take your Sim for an afternoon stroll, but they just can’t seem to handle it. Maybe they have to use the bathroom or they encountered a dreaded puddle, but all of a sudden they’re clinging on for dear life. We appreciate that EA has made it a point of including realism in the Sims. Yeah, if you spend too long in the pool, you’re never going to get out. But this is taking it too far. Your poor little Sim can’t even take in the daylight sometimes without taking his life into his hands. I don’t understand how some moms can just push their children in strollers through the ocean but other Sims drown in a couple inches of water.
7 The Human Simtipede
This is super awkward. Your sims were going to sit in the same spot and suddenly they’re looking some kind of human centipede. That’s Sims logic for you. If you were both going to sit in the same spot, you’re practically the same person. There’s no telling how many gamers have thrown their laptops across the room in rage when a game glitches out and there’s no fix. Suddenly you’ve realized you’ve wasted all that precious time pouring hours and hours into your Sim’s life when you could’ve been pouring it into your own. Of course, there’s always the possibility you can keep playing the game with your double-Sim. Maybe going through life with four hands and four legs and two faces won’t be that bad.
6 Defy Your Parents And Physics
So your mom and dad told you that you could never be an artist, huh? Well you’ve defied them so much that you also defied the laws of physics. In the world of The Sims, it doesn’t matter if a swinging door gets in the way. Your sim will keep pursuing their dreams by pushing their hand through the door. Think of it this way: you’re metaphorically opening up doors for yourself. Why did you choose to set yourself up right outside a door where people come and go? Seems to me that’s just rude. But I guess when you’re painting a masterpiece you can’t be bothered to stop for things like manners and physics.