I’m tired, folks. You know that beeping sound that a fire alarm makes every five minutes when the 9-volt battery is almost dead? That’s how it feels for me to be alive. The very thought of getting out of bed in the morning gnarls up my fingers like a tree in a haunted forest. Sometimes I just eat frosting from a jar for breakfast. Sometimes I mix in Cap’n Crunch and remind myself that I’ll die surrounded by strangers.
That’s why I’m so glad to have games like Theatrhythm Final Fantasy and Melatonin! They don’t solve those problems - no, no, no, no, no, no - but they’re some of the few games that feel like pure therapeutic stress relief. As anxiety and burnout makes watching movies, listening to music, and playing games feel like homework, Theatrhythm Final Fantasy and Melatonin cut through and just make me feel good.
You probably know what Theatrhythm Final Fantasy is, so I’ll be fast. It’s Final Fantasy: The Music Game. You can grind characters from the games to meet little quests, but the real experience is just hitting buttons in the right order to classic Nobuo Uematsu music. And, you know, other Final Fantasy composers. The non-Uematsu songs are good, too. They’re fine! They’re fine.
Meanwhile, Melatonin is just Rhythm Heaven with chill vibes. And if you don’t know what Rhythm Heaven is, you’re the problem. Okay, imagine WarioWare with music. That’s Rhythm Heaven. Now, once again, imagine Rhythm Heaven with chiller vibes. That’s Melatonin. We’re all on the same page. One of the earliest stages features you catching pizza with your mouth to the beat. It’s lovely.
Neither game asks much of the player. They still require some amount of skill - both games can get difficult as hell on higher, uh, difficulties. They just don’t ask much of the player in terms of time or commitment or following a complex narrative. Don’t get me wrong: these are all elements that should be in most games. I like a good story. I like learning complex systems. I just also sometimes need a game that doesn’t require me to remember the names of thirty characters or min-max a goddamn thing.
Theatrhythm Final Fantasy and Melatonin feel casual in the way the word should be used: Games that are relaxed and simple for an audience that still cares about said games being interesting. They’re good without having to be extremely deep. Rather than prestige television, they’re like a six-episode narrative podcast you listen to on the way to work.
A big part of this is the natural flow of rhythm games themselves. While some rhythm games are more stressful than others, there’s something meditative about following a consistent pattern matching visual cues on screen. And this goes double for Melatonin’s dreamlike music and Final Fantasy’s comforting nostalgia. I can give my hands something to do and let my attention wander as I untie my brain after a day of stress.
The other factor is time. Every rhythm game can be played in short bursts. That’s another part of their design. But songs in Theatrhythm Final Fantasy and Melatonin are both designed to feel like little experiences. Rather than flashing patterns or dancing mascots, there’s a little journey we go on. It’s not a full story - and nothing of the high quality that was Elite Beat Agents. But they’re fulfilling moments of relaxed time. You kinda feel like you accomplished something. If I’ve only got an hour between getting home and when I should be getting to bed, I don’t feel guilty if I only put in 30 minutes.
Look, I’m not particularly surprised these games aren’t as popular as action blockbusters. These aren’t flashy games. Even for a spin-off of Final Fantasy, the new Theatrhythm doesn’t particularly push the envelope in graphics further than it did on the 3DS. They’re just nice. They’re calming experiences in a chaotic world filled with games that feel like jobs. Even though I like those simulator games that are actual jobs.