When we think of the most iconic characters in video games, the first thing that comes to mind is probably their character designs. Maybe after that, we think about their relationships, the stories they have been involved in, or our favorite games that they headline. One element that is rarely considered is their career path.
Whenever a character exists within a long-running franchise, there is ample opportunity for their career lineage to get a little complicated. When you pull back and view these characters with a wider lens, some absurdities begin to reveal themselves. Unquestionably, video games are host to a number of characters who have had some extraordinary "eventful" careers.
10 Animal Crossing - Villager
Let's not mince words, the villager in Animal Crossing: New Horizons was duped. They were lured to an island, tricked into purchasing a property they couldn't afford, and now they have been locked into a devious contract that sees them spending their days improving the value of the surrounding area (and generally creating wealth for the island's overlord: Tom Nook). Simply put, the villager's career is indentured servitude.
The villager's duties include procuring desirable items, fishing, farming, and doing menial tasks to please the other inhabitants of the island. On the plus side, at least the villager gets to engage in some amateur paleontology as well. But I'm sure they will be able to retire one day, they just need to pay for the next expansion Tom is adding to their house. That will probably be the last one, right?
9 Final Fight - Mike Haggar
Mike Haggar started his career as a professional wrestler in the Capcom Professional Wrestling Association (CPWA). Eventually, Haggar decided it was time to slow down, so he moved into politics and ran for mayor. Sometime after winning his mayoral race, Mike went on a vigilante tour across the city. While this type of wholly irresponsible vigilantism landed his friend Cody in jail, Mike appeared to go untouched by the hand of the law (typical).
Ultimately, Mike would decide to retire, but before he did he made sure to pardon his ol' buddy Cody. From professional wrestling, to holding a high-up political appointment, to engaging in vigilantism, Mike has certainly had an interesting run. Also, he should probably be in jail, right?
8 Yakuza - Kazuma Kiryu
Kazuma Kiryu worked his way up through the ranks of the yakuza. So, it goes without saying we all know what that career entails: helping ordinary people with their problems, generously giving to those less fortunate, selflessly risking your life to help those in need. Also, and this is important - never, ever stealing from anyone, defrauding anyone, or harassing anyone. You know, Yakuza stuff.
But while Kiryu has risen to the highest rank of Yakuza, becoming the fourth chairman of the Tojo clan, he has had a number of other careers. He has been an extraordinarily successful real estate mogul, a club manager, and ran an orphanage. And this deserves restating for emphasis; he did it all above board. Because being a Yakuza is all about integrity. Wait a minute...
7 Ace Attorney - Phoenix Wright
Phoenix Wright has had quite the career. While he has accomplished great things and helped a lot of people, it hasn't always been a smooth ride. Here is a fun fact: Phoenix Wright, a lawyer, has been on trial himself. Three times. Well, that's concerning. But don't worry, he was only disbarred once.
So what does a disbarred lawyer do, you ask? Well, play poker professionally, of course. After seven years of doing that, Phoenix would be back on trial again (because what else is new). After he was acquitted of those charges he retook the bar and was, once again, a lawyer. The only question is how long until he is put on trial again.
6 No More Heroes - Travis Touchdown
Travis Touchdown is a high-rolling, top-class assassin. He has climbed to the top of the United Assassin Association's rankings twice now (as well as recently climbing to the top of the Galactic Superhero Rankings). In between dispatching some of the highest-profile assassins in the world, Travis occupies his time mowing lawns, picking up garbage, and cleaning graffiti.
Travis has always been a bit of a contradiction. On one hand, he lives the glitzy life of a high-profile assassin, on the other, he spends the rest of his time working menial labor jobs. Maybe if he bought fewer leather jackets (and anime figurines) he could spend more time being an assassin and less time picking up coconuts.
5 Pokemon - Any Pokemon Trainer
Oh, you're a Pokemon trainer are you? Well, that sounds like fun. What does that entail? Traveling the world, forcing Pokemon to fight each other in the wild (capturing the wounded ones in the process), and challenging other trainers in Pokemon cockfights, you say. Wait, how old are you again?
Not to mention how incredibly murky the pay structure is; it looks like Pokemon battles are some kind of gambling arrangement, as your opponent always pays out after they lose. Yes, from rampant animal abuse to flagrant child labor law violations, the life of a Pokemon trainer is extraordinarily strange.
4 Uncharted - Nathan Drake
Nathan Drake describes his job as being a "treasure hunter". And, to be fair, he does hunt for treasure. What makes things awkward is he does it in foreign countries (off the books). Even more awkward is that while he "hunts for treasure" he shoots people. A lot of people. Some of them shoot at him first, but he seems to instigate a lot of the violence as well. Moreover, this shooting (and explosives throwing) often takes place in recently discovered, ancient ruins.
Don't kid yourself, Nathan Drake is a smooth-talking, self-employed, black-ops mercenary, who steals national treasures from foreign nations. To his credit, he is unquestionably a self-starter.
3 Resident Evil: Village - The Duke
The Duke is just a merchant, right? In Resident Evil: Village, The Duke sells and buys goods. Nothing odd about that, except that The Duke doesn't just deal with Ethan, he has official business arrangements with all the antagonists. To the point where The Duke has dedicated quarters in the lairs of all of Mother Miranda's children.
More curiously, it would appear that The Duke is following Ethan. We can probably rule out the possibility that your encounters with him are coincidental. No, it would appear that The Duke's job has him stalking his customers and lying in wait to sell them things at his popup shop. To be fair, by the time Ethan rolls into town he is one of the few people interested in buying anything, so maybe The Duke is just being a good capitalist.
2 Mario
Everyone knows what Mario's job is: Mario is a plumber. However, while you could list well over a dozen careers we have seen Mario take up (how many plumbers are also medical doctors on the side), the one thing we have never seen him do is plumbing. Does Mario even know what a plumber does? What are the chances that his description of plumbing would include fighting gorillas and dragons?
No, Mario's true occupation is that he is a multi-talented athlete. He plays every sport on a professional level and has even participated in multiple Olympic events. When he isn't playing the sport, he is quite happy to referee (clearly Mario is in it for the love of the game). Don't be fooled by the dad bod, Mario is the greatest athlete mankind has ever known.
1 Metal Gear Solid - Revolver Ocelot
It is easy enough to follow the career of Revolver Ocelot from Metal Gear Solid. First, he was a codebreaker for the NSA, then he defected to Soviet Russia and started working for the GRU, he was promoted to major under Colonel Volgin. Except he was a spy for the CIA. Also, at the same time, he was a spy for the KGB.
From there, Revolver Ocelot was a founding member of a shadowy organization that was ultimately controlling the United States of America (and focused on controlling the world), was a member of multiple military groups (often acting as their torture specialist), and was the leader of a terrorist organization that nearly destabilized the world. You can't say the man wasn't accomplished.